“Callant, hold your peace,” said Lauderdale. His voice was so harsh and
strange, that it jarred in the air, and he rose up with a sudden
movement, rising like a tower into the twilight, through which the
pleasant reflections from the fire sparkled and played as lightly as if
the talk had been all of pleasure. “Be silent, sir,” cried Colin’s
friend. “How dare you say to me that any word but truth can come out of
the Mistress’s lips? How dare ye--” But here Lauderdale himself came to
a sudden pause. He went to the window, as Colin had done, and then came
quickly back again. “Because we’re a wee concerned and anxious about
him, he thinks he may say what he likes,” said the philosopher, with a
strange, short laugh. “It’s the way with such callants. They’re kings,
and give the laws to us that ken better. You may say what you like,
Colin, but you must not name anything that’s no true with your mother’s
name.”
It is strange to feel that you are going to die. It is stranger still to
see your friends profoundly conscious of the awful news they have to
convey, painfully making light of it, and trying to look as if they
meant nothing. Colin perceived the signification of his mother’s
pathetic smiles, of his friend’s impatience, of the vigilant watch they
kept upon him. He saw that, if perhaps her love kept a desperate spark
of hope alight in the Mistress’s heart, it _was_ desperate, and she put
no confidence in it. All this he perceived, with the rapid and sudden
perception which comes at such a crisis. Perhaps for a moment the blood
went back upon his heart with a suffocating sense of danger, against
which he could make no stand, and of an inevitable approaching fate
which he could not avoid or flee from. The next minute he laughed aloud.
The sound of his laughter was strange and terrible to his companions.
The Mistress took her boy’s hand and caressed it, and spoke to him in
the soothing words of his childhood. “Colin, my man--Colin, my bonnie
man!” said the mother whose heart was breaking. She thought his laugh
sounded like defiance of God, defiance of the approaching doom; and such
a fear was worse even than the dread of losing him. She kept his
reluctant fingers in hers, holding him fast to the faith and resignation
of his home. As for Lauderdale, he went away out of sight, struggling
with a hard sob which all his strength could not restrain; and it was in
the silence of this moment that Colin’s laugh, more faintly, more
softly, with a playful sound that went to their hearts, echoed again
into the room.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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