“Your experiences!” said Meredith. He put his thin arm eagerly, before
any one was aware what he intended to do, through Lauderdale’s arm. “I
frighten and horrify many,” said the invalid, not without a gleam of
satisfaction; “but there are so few, so miserably few, with whom it is
possible to have true communion. Let me share your experiences--there
must be instruction in them.”
The philosopher, thus seized, made a comical grimace, unseen by anybody
but Colin; but the sick man was far too much in earnest to observe any
reluctance on the part of his new acquaintance, and Lauderdale submitted
to be swept on in the strange wind of haste and anxiety and eagerness
which surrounded the dying youth, to whom a world lying in wickedness,
and “I, I alone” left to maintain the knowledge of God among men, was
the one great truth. There was not much room to move about upon the
deck; and, as Meredith turned and went on, with his arm in Lauderdale’s,
his sister, who was sharply turned round also by his movement, found it
hard enough to maintain her position by his side. Though he was more
attached to her than to any other living creature, it was not his habit,
as it might have been in happier circumstances, to care for her comfort,
or to concern himself about her personal convenience. He swept her along
with him over the hampered deck, through passages which were barely wide
enough for two, but through which she crushed herself as long as
possible, catching her dress on all the corners, and losing her breath
in the effort. As for Colin, he found himself left behind with a
half-amazed, half-mortified sensation.
Not his the form, not his the eye,
That youthful maidens wont to fly;
and though he was not truly open to Lauderdale’s jibe concerning
flirtations, the very name of that agreeable but dangerous amusement had
roused him into making the discovery that Meredith’s sister was very
pretty, and that there was something extremely interesting in the rapt
devotion to her brother, which at first had prevented him from observing
her. It seemed only natural that, when the sick man seized upon
Lauderdale, the young lady should have fallen to Colin’s share; and he
kept standing where they had left him, as has been described, half
amused and half mortified, thinking to himself that, after all, he was
not an ogre, nor a person whom ladies in general are apt to avoid.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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