Then the remembrance of the hundred pounds he had hidden away in the
cleft of the rock up on the hills came to him, making him laugh;
because there was no question now as to who needed it. He came back to
it a beggar; beggared, indeed, of all save life. Yet life was all. The
words of the Indian sage came back to him:--
"Indestructible the life is, spreading life thro' all.
I say to Thee weapons reach not the life.
Flame burns it not, waters cannot overwhelm
Nor dry winds wither it. Impenetrable,
Unentered, unassailed, unharmed, untouched,
Immortal, all arriving, stable, sure,
Thus is the Life declared."
Vaguely he felt comforted. The sense of Unity lay around him in the
air. He saw the Golden Gateway. He knew that its Door was open. But
his love kept him from entering. He could yield himself without one
sigh to the Beginning that was the End, but he could not yield her,
for he had not yet realised that she also was the Beginning, the End.
The dawn was just breaking as he reached the gap, and searching in the
cleft found nothing.
Was he glad, or was he sorry? He was not sure. In a way he felt more
free, since he need now have no plans for the future. He could sit
down and watch the sun rise. After that he could walk over
Llwydd-y-Bryd to the coastline by the country town, and so--anywhere!
This was sufficient, surely, for the moment.
The sun rose in a panoply of purple and red with, low down above the
hills, a band or two of torquoise blue to hint of the vast fields of
calm ether beyond the storm clouds of the world.
"Aura! Aura! Aura!"
Even there, to the far, unending depths, the cry echoed. A cry apart,
poignant with individual anguish.
He started up and moved on. The staghorn moss trailed clinging to the
soil beneath his feet, a hawk hovering in the air was held to its
place also by the same force which sent the world on which he stood,
spinning on its way. But still that love, that grief of his, would not
be made one with Nature.
"Aura! Aura! Aura!"
He stood on the summit of Llydd-y-Bryd once more. Even the
"gingerbeer" had gone from the shieling now; but it would not be long
before humanity returned once more with placard and paste-pot to
appropriate the spot to base uses.
Down in the blue hollow yonder lay Cwmfaernog, and in Cwmfaernog
lay--no! not Aura! Aura was of the woods and hills. He could feel her
in them separate, distinct from himself. He would not give her up; he
could not. He would give one more look at the peaceful little valley
from the crag yonder, and then take her with him; something he would
not yield, not even to the Force which held the round world sure.
The round world perhaps--but--ye Gods!
His foot slipped, he caught at a root to save himself, it gave way--he
fell.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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