"Please, Mr. Herriott, listen to me patiently. I must go back so far.
She did not love you when she married you. Why she so suddenly took that
awful step I don't know. She refused to explain. I believed that her
father had persuaded her, but she assured me he had no knowledge of her
intention until after she had voluntarily made her decision, and she is
absolutely truthful. She is reticent and proud, but of false statements
she is incapable. She has never confided the motive of her rash marriage
to me, and what she is unwilling to have me know, nobody else can ever
tell me. Better than any one living I understand her, and when she came
back with her father from Greyledge I saw a great change in her; she was
not the indifferent girl whom you had taken away. The estrangement
between Judge Kent and herself had ended, and she rejoiced in the
cordial reconciliation, but some sad mystery in the background
overshadowed her and puzzled me. The day she received that express
package from you she suddenly seemed to go frantic, and her distress was
so overwhelming I was frightened. Never before or since has she shown
such passionate grief. She told me she had wronged, wounded you, and
that you would never forgive her. How she wronged you she would not
explain, and I don't know any more now than I did then. But she insisted
again and again that you were not to blame--that it was entirely her
fault, and she must bear the sorrow she had brought upon herself. She
wrung her hands and begged me to pray she might die before you came back
and rejected her. When I tried to comfort her, and asked why you should
do such a cruel, unjust thing, she wailed: 'You loved your husband; if
you had wounded him past pardon, could you bear to talk about it? Don't
question me. Think of your Robert, and try to realize how I feel.' All
that night she walked the floor of her room, and next morning she looked
years older--so white, so silent, as if gazing down into a grave. Since
then she has never been the same Eglah. Something in your last message,
which I did not see, slew her peace of mind for all time. She shut
herself away from society, lived exclusively with her father and with
me. When Judge Kent died I dreaded a total collapse in the child who had
worshipped him from her babyhood; but she bore the awful strain
silently, calmly, surprisingly. Mr. Whitfield put his arm around her
shoulder as she stood by the coffin, and, with tears in his eyes, the
old man praised her devotion and her bravery. She looked up at him with
a strange smile on her bloodless lips.
"'One can suffer only so much, then numbness comes. After the misery of
many months a last blow does not crush. The petrified are not always
where they belong--in the grave.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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