A Spoil of Office: A Story of the Modern WestGarland, Hamlin
General
A Spoil of Office: A Story of the Modern West
Garland, Hamlin
Farmers -- Fiction
"Cedarville gives seventy votes for Kimball, and a hundred and ten for
Talcott."
The Independents shouted themselves hoarse, and flung their caps in the
air. Talcott had carried both of the towns of the county; he was sure
of the farmers. The boys howled like savages, and tripped each other
over the railings and seats, boxed hats, punched the men in the back,
and hid around their legs; while the clerk went on with his reading, at
more and more frequent intervals, of reports from other States and
districts of the congressional field. The old-line Democrats were
delirious with joy. The promised land was in sight.
It was about half past twelve o'clock when Colonel Russell conceded
Bradley's election, and two stout men toiled up the stairs, bringing
his forfeit of two barrels of apples. Amid wild yells from the crowd,
they threw the barrels to the floor, where they burst, and sent
Northern Spys rolling in every direction.
Then came a wilder roar and scramble, that outdid everything that had
gone before, and a surging mass of struggling men and boys covered the
apples. They threw themselves upon each other's backs. They clawed like
wild-cats, barked like wolves. They kicked each other out of the way,
and scratched and mauled each other, crushing hats, tearing coats,
bruising shins. As fast as one man filled his hands or arms or pockets,
the others set upon him, struck them from his arm, snatched them from
his hands, tore them from his pockets, or tripped him headlong to the
floor, where he rolled in the filthy sawdust, under the feet of the
crazy mob.
The wrestle of starving wild hogs for corn or potatoes could not have
been more tumultuous or ear-splitting than this ferocious, jovial
scramble. It ceased only when the last apple was secured, so that none
could snatch it away. Then began the fusilade of cores and parings.
Shining stove-pipe hats were choice game, and to throw a core clean
through a silk hat was a distinction which everybody seemed to covet.
In five minutes not a tall hat was to be seen. Colonel Peavy wrapped
his handkerchief around his, thus drawing upon himself the attack of
the entire crowd, and he was forced to retreat.
Then they threw at faces and bald heads. The uproar redoubled. No one
was drunk, no one was mad; but the scene was furious with mirth. It was
contagious. Word spread outside, and the whole male population of the
town jammed into the stairway, and struggled furiously to reach the
court-room, where the fun was going on. A stranger would have imagined
it the loosing of the hordes of hell.
In the streets of the town, the boys, without the slightest care about
who was elected, were stealing kerosene barrels and dry-goods boxes, in
order to keep the bonfire going. When they heard of the free apples
which they had missed by their zeal in bonfiring, a bitterness came
upon them, and they came together and tried to organize a committee to
go down and see Judge Brown and state their grievance.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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