The sudden meeting the night before had shaken her. After the ordeal of
the dinner her nerves had given way, and she had lain awake all night
with throbbing temples. She had risen, faint and ill, to read his note
beseeching an interview. She had strung herself to go through with it.
As the hours passed she had grown more self-possessed; while waiting,
had put some extra tidying touches to her room, rearranged some flowers
she had bought the day before. She had even smiled to herself. After
all, what claim had this man upon her?
He had come, trim, point-device in his attire, looking scarcely a day
older than when she had forsaken all for him. He had pleaded, owned
himself a scoundrel, strengthening his cause by his very weakness.
“I was going to marry you, Kitty. Before God I was! On my return from
Mexico. I thought I was going to make millions--become one of the little
gods of the earth. No man living would have let go the chance. I guess I
was to have made you more powerful than the ordinary run of queens.
Who could have told those mines were a fraud? Van Hoetmann himself was
deceived. I came back at once. You were gone. I tried to trace you. I
lost you. And all these years I have been kind of haunted by it. Before
I left Chicago, a man was bragging he had never brought a cloud upon
a woman's life. I said to him: 'Sir, go down on your bended knees and
thank Almighty God for it.'”
She had listened, at first rather sceptically. But gradually his
earnestness had convinced her of his sincerity. She had loved him, as
she had understood love in those far-off days, when her young shadowed
nature had expanded like a plant to the light. A little tenderness
remained, called from forgotten depths to the surface. She had spoken
very gently to him, forgiven him, the sweeter woman prompting her.
And then he had urged marriage.
“It is what I have come to tell you, Kitty. Let me make amends for
the past by devoting my life to your happiness. I am not right bad all
through. I'll begin again to love you as I did when first I saw you in
that white dress, among the roses of the verandah.”
She had smiled, shaken her head, it could never be. She was quite happy.
He had done his part, she was satisfied with his intentions. But the
amends she claimed was that he should never seek to see her again. Only
on that condition, that he left Geneva at once, looking upon this as a
final parting, could she give him her full, unqualified forgiveness. He
had insisted, wearying her. She had risen, held out her hand to him.
“You must go. It is a generous impulse that urges you to make reparation
in this manner, not love--”
She paused for a breath, instinctively trying him with a touchstone, and
smiling as it failed to draw the response of passion.
“Let your conscience be easy. You wish to serve me--you have a trust--my
honour--you can cherish it.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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