Without doubt if poor Ely had not been the disabused nihilist who
believed, as she once said energetically, that "there is only this
world," all the obscure fatalities that were crushing her down would
have been made clear with a blinding light. She would have recognized a
mysterious justice, stronger than our intentions, more infallible than
our calculations, in the encounter that made the punishment of her
double adultery issue from the friendship of those who had been her
guilty partners in her failings, and caused those same accomplices to be
each a punishment to the other. But in the blow that overwhelmed her she
saw only the base vengeance of a former lover. And such a form of
suffering could only end in degrading her. All her virtues of generous
indulgence, of tender goodness, of sentimental scrupulousness that her
love, magnificent in its enthusiastic spontaneity, had awakened in her
heart, had receded from her. And she felt that all the most hideous and
all her worst instincts were taking their place at the idea that these
two men, both of whom had possessed her, one of whom she loved to the
verge of madness, despised her. And in imagination she again saw Pierre
as he was there before her, only twenty-four hours before, so devoted,
so noble, so happy!--Ah! Pierre!--All her bitterness melted into a flood
of tears as she cried aloud the beloved name. Ah! to what good was it
that she cried for him? The man for whom such passionate sighs were
breathed would not even listen to them!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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