Then he would see in another corner of the drawer the packet of letters
from his mistress. He had not had strength to destroy them. Other words
spoken by Olivier recurred to his memory--words in which he had
affirmed, had vowed that she had loved him, Pierre, truly and sincerely.
Did not every detail of their romantic intimacy prove that Olivier was
right? Was it possible that she had lied upon the yacht, at Genoa, and
in so many other unforgetable hours? A passionate desire to see her
again took possession of Pierre. It appeared to him that if he could
only see her, question her, understand her, his sufferings would be
soothed. He imagined the questions that he would ask and her replies. He
could hear her voice. All his energy melted away before the fatal
weakness of his desire, a degraded desire whose sensuality was sharpened
by scorn. And at such moments the young man hated himself. He remembered
his vow. He remembered all he owed to his self-respect, all he owed to
his friend. What he had said at the moment of the sacrifice was true--he
felt that it was true. If ever he again saw Ely, nevermore could he meet
Olivier. He had a confused impression already that he hated them both.
He had suffered so much from him on her account; so much from her on his
account. Honor finally always won the day, and he would hold himself
erect, strengthen himself in the renunciation he had resolved upon. "It
is only a trial," he said to himself, "and it will not last forever.
Once I am far from here I shall forget it."
This singular existence had lasted five days, when two incidents
happened, one after the other, one caused by the other--two incidents
that were to have a decisive influence upon the tragic dénouement of
the tragic situation.
The first was a visit from the jovial and artful Corancez. Pierre had,
in fact, expected him before. In order to put a bar to any tentative at
reconciliation, the young man had given strict orders that he was at
home to no one. But Corancez was one of those people who have the gift
of triumphing over the most difficult obstacles. And on the morning of
the sixth day, a morning as bright and radiant as the one upon which
they had visited the Jenny together, Hautefeuille saw him again enter
his room, the everlasting bunch of pinks in his buttonhole, a smile on
his lips, a healthy color in his face, and his eyes bright with
happiness. A patch of dry collodion upon his temple bore witness to the
fact that he had received a severe blow either the night before or very
recently. The purple swelling was still visible. But this sign of an
accident did not diminish his good humor nor the gayety of his
physiognomy.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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