A Whim, and Its Consequences: Collection of British Authors Vol. CXIVJames, G. P. R. (George Payne Rainsford)
General
A Whim, and Its Consequences: Collection of British Authors Vol. CXIV
James, G. P. R. (George Payne Rainsford)
Fiction
Vague professions of innocence, the testimony of persons who had known
him long to his general character--this was all; but he knew well that
all this was nothing in a case like that before him. He was aware,
moreover, that the refusal to give explanations would be construed
into a mere consciousness of guilt, and yet he could neither do away
the presumption of crime which existed in a thousand of the facts
against him, nor even account for one moment of his time without
casting back the charge of murder upon his own brother. It was a
terrible situation. The thought of Rose Tracy aggravated it, shook his
firmness, made his resolution waver; and starting up, he paced his
cell backwards and forwards for some minutes. But he conquered
himself; he conquered the repugnance to death and cold forgetfulness;
he conquered the clinging of the heart to life and love, and he sat
down again, saying aloud, "No, I will not be the destroyer of my
brother."
I will not say that hope went out, for the hope beyond this life
remained; but the hope of saving himself, the hope of his counsel
making any available defence, passed away as he reviewed the strong
presumptive proofs against him, spreading out, link after link, in a
long chain, which bound him ready for a death of ignominy. He made up
his mind to it. He gave up the consideration of the charge and the
defence. He took one step over the earthly future, and, as if standing
at the ports of the tomb, he ventured to cast his eyes beyond. It is,
it must be, an awful moment for any man, when the words of fate are
pronounced and heard, when the irreversible decree has been notified
to us, "This night shall thy soul be required of thee!" when all the
soft ties are to be broken; when all the warm affections are to come
to an end; when all the new cold things of an untried fate are before
us, and the prospect from the top of the bleak hill of death swells
into eternity. Then comes the terrible question, "How shall I answer
at the Throne of one perfectly pure, perfectly holy, for all the
trespasses committed in this mortal state? how have I stood the trial,
trod the path assigned to me? how have I fought the fight? how have I
employed the talent?"
Who is there at such a moment that can dare to answer, "Well?"
What would it be, when the presence of an earthly judge is terrible to
an offender, to plead one's own cause, to be one's own advocate before
the Almighty and Omniscient; to stand polluted in the Holy of Holies,
in the presence of Him who will not behold iniquity? But there is an
Advocate to raise his voice in our behalf; not to defend, but to
mediate, to justify us by his righteousness, to atone for us by his
blood, to make the compensation which eternal justice requires for
sin, and reconcile the offending creature to the offended Creator.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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