His countenance, as he stood at the foot of the bed, told all the agony
of his mind. They tell me so, for I saw him not; I could only see that
object whom I was soon to behold no more!
My mother knew him; read, no doubt, all his wild wan look expressed; and
smiling kindly, held out her hand to him. He was instantly on his knees
by her bed-side; and she seemed, from the look she gave him, to feel all
the maternal love for him revive which she had experienced through life.
Your husband, my dear friend, now came to perform his interesting duty,
and we left her alone with him.
Oh! what a night succeeded! But Pendarves felt more than I. My faculties
were benumbed: I had made such unnatural efforts for some time past to
appear cheerful, while my heart was breaking, that I was too much
exhausted to be able to endure this new demand on my fortitude and my
strength; therefore already was that merciful stupor coming over me,
which saved, I firmly believe, both my life and my reason.
My mother frequently, during that night, joined my hand in that of
Pendarves, grasped them thus united, while her eyes were raised to
heaven in prayer, but spoke not. At length, however, just as the last
moment was approaching, she faltered out--"Seymour, be kind, be very
kind to my poor child; she has only you now."
He replied by clasping me to his breast; and in one moment more all was
over!
You know what followed; you know that for many weeks I was blessedly
unconscious of every thing, and that I lay between death and life under
the dominion of fever. My first return of consciousness and of speech
showed itself thus:--I heard voices below, and recognised them, no
doubt, as female voices; for I drew back the curtain, and asked my
mother's faithful Alice whose voice I heard. But the joy my speaking
gave the poor creature was instantly damped, for I added--"But I
conclude it is my mother's voice, and I dare say she will be here
presently."
Alice, bursting into tears, replied--"Your blessed mother never come
now."
"Oh, but by-and-by will do:" and I closed my eyes again.
Alice now ran down stairs to call my husband, and tell him what
had passed. The voices I heard were those of Mrs. Oswald and Lady
Martindale, who had called every day to inquire for me; and Pendarves
had been this day prevailed upon to go down to them. But he bitterly
repented his complaisance when he found I had heard them talking;
though he rejoiced in my restored hearing, which had seemed quite gone.
He hastily, therefore, dismissed his visitors, and resumed his station
by my bed-side. I knew him, and spoke to him; but damped all his
satisfaction by asking for my mother, and wondering where she was. He
could not answer me, and was doubtful what he ought to reply when he
recovered himself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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