Jennie rested her fair cheek against her open palm again, and looked at
the dingy window. There was a long silence between them--Wentworth
absorbed in watching her clear-cut profile and her white throat, his
breath quickening as he feasted his eyes on her beauty.
'I have always got angry,' she said at last, in a low voice with the quiver
of a suppressed sigh in it, 'when other people have said that to me--I
wonder why it is I merely feel hurt and sad when you say it? It is so easy
to say, "Oh, anything"--so easy, so easy. You are a man, with the strength
and determination of a man, yet you have met with disappointments and
obstacles that have required all your courage to overcome. Every man has,
and with most men it is a fight until the head is gray, and the brain
weary with the ceaseless struggle. The world is utterly merciless; it
will trample you down relentlessly if it can, and if your vigilance
relaxes for a moment, it will steal your crust and leave you to starve.
Every time I think of this incessant sullen contest, with no quarter
given or taken, I shudder, and pray that I may die before I am at the
mercy of the pitiless world. When I came to London, I saw, for the first
time in my life, that hopeless, melancholy promenade of the sandwich-men;
human wreckage drifting along the edge of the street, as if cast there by
the rushing tide sweeping past them. They--they seemed to me like a
tottering procession of the dead; and on their backs was the announcement
of a play that was making all London roar with laughter. The awful comedy
and tragedy of it! Well, I simply couldn't stand it. I had to run up a
side-street and cry like the little fool I was, right in broad daylight.'
Jennie paused and tried to laugh, but the effort ended in a sound
suspiciously like a sob. She dashed her hand with quick impatience across
her eyes, from which Wentworth had never taken his own, seeing them
become dim, as if the light from the window proved too strong for them,
and finally fill as she ceased to speak. Searching ineffectually about
her dress for a handkerchief, which lay on the table beside her parasol
unnoticed by either, Jennie went on with some difficulty:
'Well, these poor forlorn creatures were once men--men who have gone
down--and if the world is so hard on a man with all his strength and
resourcefulness, think--think what it is for a woman thrown into this
inhuman turmoil--a woman without friends--without money--flung among
these relentless wolves--to live if she can--or--to die--if she can.'
The girl's voice broke, and she buried her face in her arms, which rested
on the table.
Wentworth sprang to his feet and came round to where she sat.
'Jennie,' he said, putting his hand on her shoulder. The girl, without
looking up, shook off the hand that touched her.
'Go back to your place,' she cried, in a smothered voice. 'Leave me
alone.'
'Jennie,' persisted Wentworth.
The young woman rose from her chair and faced him, stepping back a pace.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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