English fiction -- 19th century; Short stories, English
_Apropos_ of Sabbath, I have come across some lovely reading which
it grieves me that I have not preserved. Chautauqua, you must know,
shuts down on Sundays. With awful severity an eminent clergyman has
been writing to the papers about the beauties of the system. The
stalls that dispense terrible drinks of Moxie, typhoidal milk-shakes
and sulphuric-acid-on-lime-bred soda-water are stopped; boating is
forbidden; no steamer calls at the jetty, and the nearest railway
station is three miles off, and you can't hire a conveyance; the
barbers must not shave you, and no milkman or butcher goes his rounds.
The reverend gentleman enjoys this (he must wear a beard). I forget
his exact words, but they run: "And thus, thank God, no one can supply
himself on the Lord's day with the luxuries or conveniences that he has
neglected to procure on Saturday." Of course, if you happen to linger
inside the wicket gate--verily Chautauqua is a close preserve--over
Sunday, you must bow gracefully to the rules of the place. But what are
you to do with this frame of mind? The owner of it would send missions
to convert the "heathen," or would convert you at ten minutes' notice;
and yet if you called him a heathen and an idolater he would probably
be very much offended.
Oh, my friends, I have been to one source of the river of missionary
enterprise, and the waters thereof are bitter--bitter as hate, narrow
as the grave! Not now do I wonder that the missionary in the East is at
times, to our thinking, a little intolerant towards beliefs he cannot
understand and people he does not appreciate. Rather it is a mystery
to me that these delegates of an imperious ecclesiasticism have not
a hundred times ere this provoked murder and fire among our wards.
If they were true to the iron teachings of Centreville or Petumna or
Chunkhaven, when they came they would have done so. For Centreville or
Smithson or Squeehawken teach the only true creeds in all the world,
and to err from their tenets, as laid down by the bishops and the
elders, is damnation. How it may be in England at the centres of supply
I cannot tell, but shall presently learn. Here in America I am afraid
of these grim men of the denominations, who know so intimately the will
of the Lord and enforce it to the uttermost. Left to themselves they
would prayerfully, in all good faith and sincerity, slide gradually,
ere a hundred years, from the mental inquisitions which they now
work with some success to an institootion--be sure it would be an
"institootion" with a journal of its own--not far different from what
the Torquemada ruled aforetime. Does this seem extravagant? I have
watched the expression on the men's faces when they told me that they
would rather see their son or daughter dead at their feet than doing
such and such things--trampling on the grass on a Sunday, or something
equally heinous--and I was grateful that the law of men stood between
me and their interpretation of the law of God. They would assuredly
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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