Catholics -- Fiction; Clergy -- Fiction; France -- Fiction; Sin -- Christianity -- Fiction
Then, for the last time, she resumed her walk through the Paradou in
quest of death. What fragrant plant might need her sweet-scented tresses
to increase the perfume of its leaves? What flower might wish the gift
of her satinlike skin, the snowy whiteness of her arms, the tender pink
of her bosom? To what weakly tree should she offer her young blood? She
would have liked to be of service to the weeds vegetating beside the
paths, to slay herself there so that from her flesh some huge greenery
might spring, lofty and sapful, laden with birds at May-time, and
passionately caressed by the sun. But for a long while the Paradou still
maintained silence as if it had not yet made up its mind to confide to
her in what last kiss it would spirit away her life. She had to wander
all over it again, seeking, pilgrim-like, for her favourite spots. Night
was now more swiftly approaching, and it seemed to her as if she were
being gradually sucked into the earth. She climbed to the great rocks
and questioned them, asking whether it was upon their stony beds that
she must breathe her last breath. She crossed the forest with lingering
steps, hoping that some oak would topple down and bury her beneath the
majesty of its fall. She skirted the streams that flowed through the
meadows, bending down at almost every step she took so as to peep into
the depths and see whether a couch had not been prepared for her amongst
the water lilies. But nowhere did Death call her; nowhere did he offer
her his cold hands. Yet, she was not mistaken. It was, indeed, the
Paradou that was about to teach her to die, as, indeed, it had taught
her to love. She again began to scour the bushes, more eagerly even than
on those warm mornings of the past when she had gone searching for love.
And, suddenly, just as she was reaching the parterre, she came upon
death, amidst all the evening fragrance. She ran forward, breaking out
into a rapturous laugh. She was to die amongst the flowers.
First she hastened to the thicket-like rosary. There, in the last
flickering of the gloaming, she searched the beds and gathered all the
roses that hung languishing at the approach of winter. She plucked them
from down below, quite heedless of their thorns; she plucked them in
front of her, with both hands; she plucked them from above, rising upon
tip-toes and pulling down the boughs. So eager was she, so desperate
was her haste, that she even broke the branches, she, who had ever shown
herself tender to the tiniest blades of grass. Soon her arms were full
of roses, she tottered beneath her burden of flowers. And having quite
stripped the rose trees, carrying away even the fallen petals, she
turned her steps to the pavilion; and when she had let her load of
blossoms slip upon the floor of the room with the blue ceiling, she
again went down to the garden.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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