Across the Zodiac: The Story of a Wrecked RecordGreg, Percy
Science
Across the Zodiac: The Story of a Wrecked Record
Greg, Percy
Science fiction
"I cannot endure this. If I had dreamed your patience would have borne
with me half so far, I would never have tried it so, even for your own
sake. I meant to be found out and accept the consequences in silence.
But you trust me so, that I must tell you what I wanted to conceal.
When you kept on the surface it made me so ill"—
"But, Eveena, if the remedy be not worse than the sickness, why not
ask for it openly?"
"It was not that. Don't you understand? Of course, I would bear any
suffering rather than have done this; but then you would have found me
out at once. I wanted to conceal my suffering, not to escape it."
"My child! my child! how could you put us both to all this pain?"
"You know you would not have given me the draught; you would have left
the surface at once; and I cannot bear to be always in the way, always
hindering your pleasures, and even your discoveries. You came across a
distance that makes a bigger world than this look less than that
light, through solitude and dangers and horrors I cannot bear to think
of, to see and examine this world of ours. And then you leave things
unseen or half-seen, you spoil your work, because a girl is seasick!
You ran great risk of death and got badly hurt to see what our hunting
was like, and you will not let my head ache that you may find out what
our sea-storms and currents are! How can I bear to be such a burden
upon you? You trust me, and, I believe," (she added, colouring), "you
love me, twelvefold more than I deserve; yet you think me unwilling or
unworthy to take ever so small an interest in your work, to bear a few
hours' discomfort for it and for you. And yet," she went on
passionately, "I may sit trembling and heart-sick for a whole day
alone that you may carry out your purpose. I may receive the only real
sting your lips have given, because I could not bear that pain without
crying. And so with everything. It is not that I must not suffer pain,
but that the pain must not come from without. Your lips would punish a
fault with words that shame and sting for a day, a summer, a year;
your hand must never inflict a sting that may smart for ten minutes.
And it is not only that you do this, but you pride yourself on it.
Why? It is not that you think the pain of the body so much worse than
that of the spirit:—you that smiled at me when you were too badly
bruised and torn to stand, yet could scarcely keep back your tears
just now, when you thought that I had suffered half an hour of sorrow
I did not quite deserve. Why then? Do you think that women feel so
differently? Have the women of your Earth hearts so much harder and
skins so much softer than ours?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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