“Maggie, I call her,” he wrote, “because that name is so much like my
first love, Maddy, the little girl who though I was too old to be her
husband, and so made me very wretched for a time, until I met and knew
Margaret Atherstone. I have told her of you, Maddy; I would not marry
her without, and she seems willing to take me as I am. We shall come
home with Guy, who is the mere wreck of what he was when I last saw
him. He has told me, Maddy, all about it, and though I doubly respect
you now, I cannot say that I think you did quite right. Better that one
should suffer than two, and Lucy’s is a nature which will forget far
sooner than yours or Guy’s. I pity you all.”
This almost killed Maddy; she did not love the doctor, but the
knowledge that he was to marry another added to her misery, while what
he said of her decision was the climax of the whole. Had her sacrifice
been for nothing? Would it have been better if she had not sent Guy
away? It was anguish unspeakable to believe so, and the shadowy woods
never echoed to so bitter a cry of pain as that with which she laid her
head on the ground, and for a brief moment wished that she might die.
God pitied His child then, and for the next half hour she hardly knew
what she suffered.
There was Guy’s letter yet to read, and with a listless indifference
she opened it, starting as there dropped into her lap a small _carte de
viste_, a perfect likeness of Guy, who sent it, he said, because he
wished her to have so much of himself. It would make him happier to
know she could sometimes look at him just as he should gaze upon her
dear picture after it was a sin to love the original. And this was all
the direct reference he made to the past except where he spoke of Lucy,
telling how happy she was, and how if anything could reconcile him to
his fate, it was the knowing how pure and good and loving was the wife
he was getting. Then he wrote of the doctor and Margaret, whom he
described as a dashing, brilliant girl, the veriest tease and madcap in
the world, and the exact opposite of Maddy.
“It is strange to me why he chose her after loving you,” he wrote; “but
as they seem fond of each other, their chances of happiness are not
inconsiderable.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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