"The silent person in black came in with a bottle in a basket, and
filled our glasses with a white wine. My brother turned his glass round
as he looked at me solemnly. 'I see,' he said, and began to eat his
fish.
"'Of course,' I went on, 'your intuitions, as you call them, are quite
correct as regards me, because when I marry, she will probably be just
what you say. She would be as uncomfortable in a place like this as--as
I am.'
"'Good God!' he muttered, staring at me. 'Is it as bad as that? I should
have thought you would be glad to live decently when you get the
chance.'
"'I have simple tastes,' I answered.
"'So have the beasts of the field,' he retorted, and fixed his eyes
moodily upon his wine. I laughed.
"'Far better,' I said, 'to go each his own road and do the best he can.
I've been through a good deal, Frank, since I saw you, and I dare say
you've been through a lot too, only different. I've worked and been
worked upon, and I've come to certain conclusions. There is no place for
me in all this ordered English life, with its classes and masses and so
on. I was thinking about it this afternoon when you nearly ran over me.
Pride is at the bottom of half the misery in England. Personal integrity
is all I ask of a man, modesty what I admire most in a woman. As for
what you call splashing through mud in dress-pumps, I know what you mean
and I avoid it. _Worthless_ women are to be found in all grades.
Marriage, no doubt, is a lottery, not only for us, but for the women. I
doubt if taking thought ever makes it any less of a lottery. You say we
Carvilles have no luck with our women. I wonder what 'our women' would
say if they heard you. Are we the last word in humanity? Are we flawless
in our integrity and purpose and achievement?'
"My brother shook his head without looking up from his plate.
"'That's not what I meant at all,' he remarked sullenly. 'That sort of
thing doesn't apply to women. I was referring to breeding. Women of
breeding would not trust themselves to us.'
"'Well,' I said, 'I shan't lose any sleep about it. If I were chief of a
passenger ship, the lady-passengers of breeding----'
"My brother waved his hand. 'Let us dry up,' he said. 'You don't
understand.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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