All along the River: A NovelBraddon, M. E. (Mary Elizabeth)
General
All along the River: A Novel
Braddon, M. E. (Mary Elizabeth)
English fiction -- 19th century
She had seemed happier, or at least the little home had been brighter
and gayer after Allegra’s coming; but as the time wore on it became
clear to him that the life and gaiety were all in Allegra herself,
and that Isola was spiritless and depressed. It was as if the spring
of her life had snapped suddenly, and left her nerveless and joyless,
a submissive, unhopeful creature. That sense of disappointment and
loss which he had dimly felt, even when his home-coming had been a new
thing, had grown and deepened with the passage of time. He had bought
his land; he had added to the space and comfort of his house; he had
enlarged the stables, and bought a couple of hunters, and a cob for
harness; and while these things had been doing, the activity of his
days, the fuss and labour of arrangement and supervision, had occupied
his mind so pleasantly as to stifle those growing doubts for the time
being. But when all was done; when the vine and the figtree had been
planted, and he sat down to take his ease in their shade, then he began
to feel very keenly that his wife’s part in all that he had done was
the part of submission only. She liked this or that because he liked
it. She was content, and that was all. And the line between contentment
and resignation is so faint a demarcation that it seemed to him
sometimes as if she were only resigned, as if she suffered life rather
than lived--suffered life as holy women suffer some slow, wasting
disease, in meek subjection to a mysterious decree.
He sat beside her bed, while she battled with all the demons of
delirium; and he wondered whether--when she had been at her best, when
her mind had been brightest and clearest--she had been any nearer to
him than she was now in her madness; whether he had known any more of
her inner self--the mystery of her heart and conscience--than he knew
now, while those wild eyes stared at him without sight or knowledge.
One summer morning, as he sat alone in his watch in that dull interval
between darkness and dawn, the visions of the wandering mind took a
more consecutive form than usual. She fancied herself in a storm at
sea. The waves were rolling mountains high--were bearing down upon her
with threatenings of instant death. She feared, and yet she courted
the danger. In one minute she was recoiling from the wild rush of
waters, clinging distractedly to the brass rail at the head of her bed,
crouching against the wall as if to save herself from an advancing
wave; and in the next minute she sprang out of bed, and rushed to the
open window, wanting to throw herself out of it. Disney was only just
quick enough to seize her in his arms, and carry her back to bed. He
held her there, battling with him in a vehement effort to escape from
his restraining arms.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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