All But Lost: A Novel. Vol. 1 of 3Henty, G. A. (George Alfred)
History
All But Lost: A Novel. Vol. 1 of 3
Henty, G. A. (George Alfred)
Fiction
It is the same thing in all relations of life. If a man hopes to attain
a large fortune by the death of a relation, or by a fortunate
speculation, or successful invention, he will form plans for the future,
and build greatly upon his expectations. It will be a great shock, then,
when he finds that the money is left to another, or the speculation or
invention turns out a failure; but it will not rankle in his mind, will
not permanently affect his whole career in life as it would do had a
banker, with whom he had placed a similar sum of money, failed. It needs
certainty, or that strong belief which is the same as certainty, to make
the loss of a fortune, or the failure of a love-dream, cast a permanent
blight over a life. Had Alice Heathcote doubted Frank’s feelings for
her, she might still have loved him truly, she might have dreamed happy
dreams, and built fairy castles of love and happiness. But she never
would have quite given way to her love; she would have known that her
dreams were but visions which might never come true, and that her
castles were but baseless fabrics after all. Had she then found out that
Frank did not love her, she would have felt it as a very great pain; she
would have mourned over her vanished dreams, and her ruined castles, but
the wound, deep as it might have been, would have healed over in time,
and left but a slight scar. But she had believed, believed surely, that
her love was returned, and so had given her whole heart, and nursed her
love until it had become a part of her very being. Many things had
assisted to cause this delusion. For so many years, almost ever since
she could remember, she had looked up to him as her protector and
adviser. He had always seemed fond of her, and, having no sister of his
own, had petted and made very much of her; and Frank had a warm kindly
way about his manner and talk which might very well deceive a young girl
into the belief that his affection was love. While he was abroad, too,
he had written so often and so affectionately, that, judging his
feelings by her own, she had believed that he loved her. But most of all
she had been deceived by her uncle’s manner and talk. The little hints
and innuendos he frequently threw out, the way in which he had seemed to
consider that it was a settled thing, had impressed her with the idea
that Frank had spoken to him upon the subject before he left England,
and was only waiting until his return to ask her formally. And so she
had given her whole heart, trustingly and confidingly, and it was now a
terrible shock to find that she had been mistaken after all. She could
not blame him; she knew now that her eyes were opened, that he had never
spoken or looked as a cousin, thrown with her as he had been, might not
have done. Nor could she blame herself; for she felt that it would,
under the circumstances, have been next to impossible for her not to
have misinterpreted him. She could only lament her mistake, and feel
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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