All Men are GhostsJacks, L. P. (Lawrence Pearsall)
Philosophy
All Men are Ghosts
Jacks, L. P. (Lawrence Pearsall)
Short stories; Supernatural -- Fiction
Accordingly, the first time he took her out he mounted with trepidation,
and fear possessed his soul that she would run away with him. Though
nothing very serious followed, the fear was not entirely groundless. His
daily ride, which usually occupied exactly two hours and five minutes,
was accomplished on this occasion in one hour and twenty, and for a week
afterwards the Professor's man rubbed liniment into his back three times
a day. On the second occasion he had the ill luck to encounter the local
Hunt in full career, a thing he would have minded not the least under
ordinary circumstances, but extremely disconcerting at a moment when his
horse-sense happened to be in abeyance. Before he had time to take in
the situation, Meg joined the rushing tide, and for the next forty
minutes the field was led by the first Systematic Theologian in Europe,
who had given himself up for lost and was preparing for death. And
killed he probably would have been but for two things: the first was the
fine qualities of his mount, and the second was a literary reminiscence
which enabled him to retain his presence of mind. Even in these
desperate circumstances, the Professor's habit of talking to himself
remained in force. A friend of mine who was riding close behind him told
me that he distinctly heard Scattergood repeating the lines of the
_Odyssey_ which tell how Ulysses, on the point of suffocation in the
depths of the sea, kept his wits about him and made a spring for his
raft the instant he rose to the surface. Again and again, as the
Professor raced across the open, did he repeat those lines to himself;
and whenever a dangerous fence or ditch came in sight he would break off
in the middle of the Greek and cry aloud in English, "Now, John
Scattergood, prepare for death and sit well back"--resuming the Greek
the moment he was safely landed on the other side, and thus proving once
more that the blood of the Ironsides still ran in his veins.
Said a farmer to me one day:
"Who's that gentleman as has just gone up the lane on the chestnut
mare?"
"That," said I, "is Professor Scattergood--one of our greatest men."
"H'm," said the farmer; "I reckon he's a clergyman--to judge by his
clothes."
"He is."
"Well, he's a queer 'un for a clergyman, danged if he isn't. He's allus
talking aloud to himself. And what do you think I hear him say when he
come through last Thursday? 'John Scattergood,' says he, 'you were a
damned fool. Yes, there's no other word for it, John; you were a
_damned_ fool!'"
"That," I said, "is language which no clergyman ought to use, not even
when he is talking to himself. But perhaps the words were not his own.
They may have been used about him by some other person--possibly by his
wife, who, people say, is a bit of a Tartar. In that case he would be
just repeating them to himself, by way of refreshing his memory."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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