The glow of a stormy sunset rushed to his face as he saw the miniature
she did not attempt to conceal. She had never conceived of the dormant
passion which now awoke in his eye and form; but she did not quail.
"I found this over there, and opened it thoughtlessly, not suspecting
what it was or to whom it belonged. I am very sorry."
The storm passed while she was speaking. The man's wonderful
self-command was master. He dipped up the water with a careful hand;
the leafy cup did not quiver.
"Do you like it? is it cool?"
"Yes--thank you."
He drank draught after draught himself, threw away the leaves, and
resumed his seat upon the bank.
"There is no help for it, Ida! you must hear what I did not intend
you ever should; not that I disdain your sympathy, but it is a rule
with me not to disturb my friends with troubles, which they cannot
alleviate. I do not know what suspicions have been forced upon you;
if they are of the honor and affection I owe my brother, or of _her_
fidelity to him, they are groundless. That picture was painted for me
before I had any intimation that his was the prize I foolishly hoped to
secure. I relinquished her; but this is the amulet which has saved me
in many temptations. Although hope was no more, memory remained; and
vice could not mate with the visions of purity that memory recalled.
There has not been a time since I first saw her, a laughing babe,
just liberated from her nurse's arms, when I have not loved her more
than any other earthly being. As boy and man I have thought, studied,
labored for her alone. When I quitted home to seek my fortune, she was
still a child, who clung weepingly to me, and kissed me as fondly as
she did her father. It was the last time! At my next visit she was away
at school;--at the second I obtained that curl. She was then fifteen;
innocent and loving, full of jesting surprise at 'Charley's mannish
ways,' and hurt that I would not call her 'sister.' She did not ask
this the ensuing summer. Lynn was with me; and in the confidence of a
hope that saw no cloud ahead, I imparted to him my dreams and desires,
and engaged him to take her portrait secretly. I went back to New York,
and wrote to her father, asking his sanction of the proposal I could
not delay. The letter was upon my desk, ready for the post, when one
arrived from Arthur. He was not to blame for his silence; I had been
as reserved to him; but he entreated my forgiveness for hiding this,
his only secret, from me. She knew it now;--her father's only objection
was their youth--a 'fault,' he remarked, jocosely, 'which will mend
with time.' In place of the letter to my guardian, I forwarded one to
my brother, congratulating him upon his happy engagement to the woman
I idolized. He is worthy of her, if a mortal can be. I can see that
it is best. He has talents and energy, and loves her as she should be
loved--I am rough and eccentric, caring and striving for nothing, now
that my guiding star has set."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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