"I am not satisfied with this selfish hoarding. A voice is ever urging
me on,--'Create! create!' it cries; and while my pencil moves, I am a
creator; exulting in the pictures graven upon my soul, as no parent
ever joyed over a beloved child. 'They are mine--mine!' I repeat in
an ecstacy. I have wept above--almost worshipped them! Then comes the
chill, grey light of critical reason, as when you awake at morning, and
see things as they _are_: the soul-pictures are beauteous still:--my
copy the veriest daub!"
"The keenness of your disappointment is an augury of success. The
lithography is perfect--you must not despond at the failure of one
proof-impression. Your mortification is a greater triumph than the
complacency with which a mediocre genius surveys his work."
"You remember Sheridan's maiden speech," said Charley.
"I have read of Demosthenes'," replied Lynn.
"Sheridan's was a similar case. He was hooted at for his presumption;
his first and second attempts were wretched: and his friends advised
him to retire from the rostrum forever. 'Never!' said he, striking his
breast. 'It is _here_, and shall come out!'"
"A glorious 'coming out' it was!" responded Ida. "What do you say
now?"--to Lynn.
"That it is _here_!" returning her bright look. "Was ever man more
blessed in his friends? More fortunate than Adam, I take my guardian
angels with me, from the Paradise I leave to-morrow."
"You must array one in a less questionable shape, if you would have men
admit his angelic relationship," said Charley, with a grimace. "What
are you looking at?"
Lynn did not reply. They were upon a hill; and some object in the
valley beneath fastened his gaze. The pensive cast of his features
bordered upon gloom, as they neared it. Ida saw only a graceful
knoll, bounded, except towards the west, by a chain of more imposing
eminences. A monarch oak stood in isolated sovereignty upon its
summit; it had shaded a dwelling, for one chimney yet remained; and
the sickly herbage of the slope was not the produce of a virgin soil.
Lynn stopped. Not a word was spoken, his eyes were too full of tender
sadness; the man--not the artist, looked from them.
"A lonely tree, and a desolate hearth-stone!" muttered he. "It is
prophetic!"
"Is the spot known to you?" asked Ida, gently, as they rode on.
"It was my birth-place."
"I had forgotten;" said Charley. "You were very young when you left it."
"But I remember it. I could point out to you the very place where my
mother taught me to walk;--a grass-plat before the door:--she upon
the step, my father kneeling at a short distance, and each tempting
me to undertake the journey from one to the other. They are gone!
parents, brother, sisters! there is but one puny scion of a noble line
remaining!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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