Amethyst: The Story of a BeautyColeridge, Christabel R. (Christabel Rose)
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Amethyst: The Story of a Beauty
Coleridge, Christabel R. (Christabel Rose)
England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
"You are angry? I am making you angry on purpose. Every word I say to
you is for an end of my own. Then there was your boy lover. I was
afraid of him till I saw him with you. Then I had no fears at all. But
I couldn't stand the thought that you might be still bound in heart to a
fellow who had had scruples about you, who cared one iota to know what
you had _done_--when he knew _you_. Then there was the young poet. Of
course he was in love with you, but there wasn't stuff enough in
dream-love for you. I weighed them all in the balance. For you see,
_I_ know you."
"Hardly well enough to say so much," said Amethyst; but he struck in--
"Ah, wait, you will not be angry with me soon. But it's time all that
was over. Now we have met again, mayn't we have one of our old
discussions about the value of life, and the good things of life? What
is the next thing for you now? Are you going to learn Greek, or
hospital nursing, or what?"
"I shall learn Greek," said Amethyst. "I mean to use my brains."
"And when the Greek is learnt?"
"Then I'll teach it."
He smiled, and suddenly changing the conversation entirely, began to
talk about a new play.
Amethyst felt a little angry with him, but she was no longer dull, and
she wondered much what he would do next.
Restharrow was a house where every one did as they liked, and, in the
evening, the large party scattered about among the different rooms. Mr
Carisbrooke came up to Amethyst, and said, "Come with me;" and, quite
careless as to whether they were noticed or not, he led the way into a
little morning-room and shut the door.
Amethyst felt bewildered. The room was full of firelight and red-shaded
lamp-light, and Oliver Carisbrooke stood in the warm glow with his
deep-set, peculiar eyes fixed full upon her.
"Amethyst," he said, "commonplace and conventional doings are not for
you. I am playing a bold game, and I think--I think--I shall win it.
I'm not going to pretend that I am what you call a good man, there are
plenty to tell you the contrary; but I am going to tell you that, after
all I have known and done, I love you passionately. Even you cannot
give me a first love. What do I care? You shall love me now. I defy
any one to say that I have let trifles stop me when my heart is set on a
purpose. Are you thinking of your half-sister? She was too weak a
creature to venture anything for my sake. But after I saw _you_, I
said, Here is my fate. So I managed for my niece to join you, and I set
to work on a plan. I caught your attention with talk that surprised
you. No other man ever dreamed of such love for you. I soon saw that
there was no chance, but by one bold stroke to tell you so. You can
understand me. You know that we can give each other _life_."
"I--I don't think I am in love with you," stammered Amethyst in a
broken, childish voice, and with eyes fixed, as if fascinated, on his
face.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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