Crucior, lapidem non habere me, ut illi mastigiae 600 cerebrum excutiam, qui me insanum verbis concinnat suis. Oh, damnation! not to have a stone to knock out the brains of this blackguard that’s driving me mad with his talk! _Tynd._ Audin lapidem quaeritare? Hear that--looking for a stone! _Arist._ Solus te solum volo, Hegio. (_struggling to contain himself_) Hegio, I want a word with you all alone. _Hegio_ Instinc loquere, si quid vis, procul tamen audiam. (_timorously_) Say it from there, if there’s anything you want--from away off there. I shall hear it all the same. _Tynd._ Namque edepol si adbites propius, os denasabit tibi mordicus. That’s right, by Jove! for if you go any nearer, he’ll bite your nose off. _Arist._ Neque pol me insanum, Hegio, esse creduis neque fuisse umquam, neque esse morbum quem istic autumat. verum si quid metuis a me, iube me vinciri: volo, dum istic itidem vinciatur. Heavens and earth, Hegio! don’t believe I’m insane, or that I have, or ever had, the disease he’s talking about. However, if you’re at all afraid of me, have me tied up. I am willing, provided that fellow is tied up too. _Tynd._ Immo enim vero, Hegio, istic, qui volt, vinciatur. No indeed, Hegio, certainly not, tie up the fellow that wants it. _Arist._ Tace modo. ego te, Philocrates false, faciam ut verus hodie reperiare Tyndarus. 610 quid mi abnutas? You keep still, now! I’ll soon show you up, you false Philocrates, for the real Tyndarus. (_Tyndarus makes signs to him behind Hegio’s back_) What, are you shaking your head at me for? _Tynd._ Tibi ego abnuto? I shaking my head at you? _Arist._ Quid agat, si absis longius? (_to Hegio_) What would he do, if you were farther off? _Hegio_ Quid ais? quid si adeam hunc insanum? See here, what if I should step up to this lunatic? _Tynd._ Nugas. ludificabitur, garriet quoi neque pes umquam neque caput compareat. ornamenta absunt: Aiacem, hunc cum vides, ipsum vides. Ridiculous! He’ll make a fool of you, jabbering something without head or tail to it. Look at this fellow, and you’re looking at a regular Ajax[F]--all but the make-up. [Footnote F: Another madman of Greek mythology.] _Hegio_ Nihili facio. tamen adibo. I don’t care. I’m going to step up to him just the same. (_approaches Aristophontes hesitantly_) _Tynd._ Nunc ego omnino occidi, nunc ego inter sacrum saxumque sto, nec quid faciam scio. (_aside_) Now I’m done for entirely. Now I’m between the axe and the altar, and what to do I don’t know. _Hegio_ Do tibi operam, Aristophontes, si quid est quod me velis. I’m at your service, Aristophontes, if there’s anything you want of me. _Arist._