Arthur Stuart in his rôle of spiritual confessor and consoler had never
before encountered such a phase of human nature. He had listened to many
a tale of sin and folly from women’s lips, but always had the sinner
bemoaned her sin, and bitterly repented her weakness. Here instead was
what the world would consider a fallen woman, who on her deathbed
regarded her weakness as her strength, her shame as her glory, and who
seemed to expect him to take the same view of the matter. When he
attempted to urge her to repent, the words stuck in his throat. He left
the deathbed of the unfortunate sinner without having expressed one of
the conflicting emotions which filled his heart. But he left it with
such a weight on his soul, such distress on his mind that death seemed to
him the only way of escape from a life of torment.
His love for Joy Irving was not killed by the story he had heard. But it
had received a terrible shock, and the thought of making her his wife
with the probability that the Baroness would spread the scandal
broadcast, and that his marriage would break his mother’s heart, tortured
him. Added to this were his theories on heredity, and the fear that
there might, nay, must be, some dangerous tendency hidden in the daughter
of a mother who had so erred, and who in dying showed no comprehension of
the enormity of her sin. Had Mrs Irving bewailed her fall, and
represented herself as the victim of a wily villain, the rector would not
have felt so great a fear of the daughter’s inheritance. A frail,
repentant woman he could pity and forgive, but it seemed to him that Mrs
Irving was utterly lacking in moral nature. She was spiritually blind.
The thought tortured him. To leave Joy at this time without calling to
see her seemed base and cowardly; yet he dared not trust himself in her
presence. So he sent her the strangely worded letter, and went away
hoping to be shown the path of duty before he returned.
At the end of three months he came home stronger in body and mind. He
had resolved to compromise with fate; to continue his calls upon Joy
Irving; to be her friend and rector only, until by the passage of time,
and the changes which occur so rapidly in every society, the scandal in
regard to her birth had been forgotten. And until by patience and
tenderness, he won his mother’s consent to the union. He felt that all
this must come about as he desired, if he did not aggravate his mother’s
feeling or defy public opinion by too precipitate methods.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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