He therefore erected his standard, which was a mop inverted, assembled
the crowd, and roared out the old note, "Redress of Grievances." The
colliers, with all their dark retinue, were to bring destruction from
Wednesbury. Amazement seised the town! the people of fortune trembled:
John Wyrley, an able magistrate, for the first time frightened in
office, with quivering lips, and a pale aspect, swore in about eighty
constables, to oppose the rising storm, armed each of them with a staff
of authority, warm from the turning-lathe, and applied to the War-office
for a military force.
The lime-powdered monarch began to fabricate his own laws, direct the
price of every article, which was punctually obeyed.
Port, or power, soon overcome a weak head; the more copious the draught,
the more quick intoxication: he entered many of the shops, and was every
where treated with the utmost reverence; took whatever goods he pleased,
and distributed them among his followers; till one of the inhabitants,
provoked beyond measure at his insolence, gave him a hearty kick on the
posteriors, when the hero and his consequence, like that of Wat Tyler,
fell together.--Thus ended a reign of seven hours; the sovereign was
committed to prison, as sovereigns ought, in the abuse of power, and
harmony was restored without blood.
THE CONJURERS.
No _head_ is a vacuum. Some, like a paltry cottage, are ill
accommodated, dark, and circumscribed; others are capacious as
Westminster-Hall. Though none are immense, yet they are capable of
immense furniture. The more room is taken up by knowledge, the less
remains for credulity. The more a man is acquainted with things, the
more willing to _give up the ghost_. Every town and village, within my
knowledge, has been pestered with spirits; which appear in horrid forms
to the imagination in the winter night--but the spirits which haunt
Birmingham, are those of industry and luxury.
If we examine the whole parish, we cannot produce one _old_ witch; but
we have plenty of young, who exercise a powerful influence over us.
Should the ladies accuse the harsh epithet, they will please to
consider, I allow them, what of all things they most wish for, _power_,
therefore the balance is in my favor.
If we pass through the planitary worlds, we shall be able to muster up
two conjurers, who endeavoured to _shine with the stars_. The first,
John Walton, who was so busy in calling the nativity of others, he
forgot his own.
Conscious of an application to himself, for the discovery of stolen
goods, he employed his people to steal them. And though, for many years
confined to his bed by infirmity, he could conjure away the property of
others, and, for a reward, reconjure it again.
The prevalence of this evil, induced the legislature, in 1725, to make
the _reception_ of stolen goods capital. The first sacrifice to this law
was the noted Jonathan Wild.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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