Interpersonal relations -- Fiction; Spiritualism -- Fiction; United States -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
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There are times in the lives of all when new departures are imminent,
when a change is impending and obligatory, yet is slow to define
itself. There is the feeling that other paths must be entered, but to
the outer eye they are unblazed.
Such a time had come to Cartice Doring. She had long felt its approach,
but knew not the end to which it pointed. Something more than impulse
stirred within her. The Spirit of Destiny itself spoke the inexorable
command to move on.
Whither? “Move on.” This was the only answer, for Destiny has a way of
making us choose our roads, though for the most part the various whips
within and without which play upon us seem to make the matter of choice
largely a thing of name only. We do what we can rather than what we
wish. This should give us a grain of comfort on dark days by relieving
us of regrets, and settling us in the conviction that we are no more
and no less than that which we must be. Even though our own nature be
the compelling and directing force, we are none the less servants to
its dicta. Call that which rules us by whatever name we choose, how
supreme is the sway!
Looking over the situation Mrs. Doring summed up the reasons for making
a change. First, she was not doing her best; she was letting down a
little all the time, and that clearly was degeneration. Pleasure in
her work had gone and perfunctory performance taken its place. She was
weary of the miserable business of writing to please the many-headed
multitude, which the late Dr. Charles Mackay was fond of describing as
“fool of a public; pig of a public,” while her honest convictions had
to be kept locked up in her soul and labeled, “Dangerous,” like a can
of dynamite.
In Prescott’s day she was free to say what she thought ought to be
said. Now, she was frequently brought to book for utterances far too
bold, in the opinion of the proprietors of the paper, who insisted on
a close connection between the counting room and editorial desk. As
a result of constantly trimming to suit the fitful breezes of public
taste, the _Register_ was losing ground. Strange law that governs the
minds of men! Kowtow to them and they despise and neglect you. Defy
them and they respect and court you.
No; she must not stay with the _Register_. Internal wranglings were
shaking it. An eruption might take place any day, changing the whole
face of its affairs.
For her salvation, intellectual and physical, she must go. Yet habit,
friendship and a horrible dread of facing new difficulties put up a
plea for her to stay. No; she must go, no matter what she had to meet,
loneliness, humiliation, disappointment, defeat, want, death itself.
MUST. Something told her that in a way that brooked no contradiction.
But she was so tired--more tired than any one dreamed, in spite of her
almost jaunty cheerfulness.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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