An outline of humor: Being a true chronicle from prehistoric ages to the twentieth century
History
An outline of humor: Being a true chronicle from prehistoric ages to the twentieth century
Wit and humor
_OF VIGILANCE IN OUR CALLING_
A thief went one night to the house of a rich man, and scaling the
roof, peeped through a hole to examine if any part of the family were
yet stirring. The master of the house, suspecting something, said
secretly to his wife, “Ask me in a loud voice how I acquired the
property I possess; and do not desist until I bid you.” The woman
complied, and began to vociferate, “My dear husband, pray tell me,
since you never were a merchant, how you obtained all the wealth which
you have now collected.” “My love,” answered her husband, “do not ask
such foolish questions.” But she persisted in her enquiries; and at
length, as if overcome by her urgency, he said, “Keep what I am going
to tell you a secret, and your curiosity shall be gratified.”
“Oh, trust me.”
“Well, then, you must know that I was a thief, and obtained what I now
enjoy by nightly depredations.” “It is strange,” said the wife, “that
you were never taken.” “Why,” replied he, “my master, who was a skilful
clerk, taught me a particular word, which, when I ascended the tops of
people’s houses, I pronounced, and thus escaped detection.” “Tell me, I
conjure you,” returned the lady, “what that powerful word was.” “Hear,
then; but never mention it again, or we shall lose all our property.”
“Be sure of that;” said the lady, “it shall never be repeated.”
“It was--is there no one within hearing?--the mighty word was
‘FALSE.’”
The lady, apparently quite satisfied, fell asleep; and her husband
feigned it. He snored lustily, and the thief above, who had heard
their conversation with much pleasure, aided by the light of the moon,
descended, repeating seven times the cabalistic sound. But being too
much occupied with the charm to mind his footing, he stepped through
the window into the house; and in the fall dislocated his leg and arm,
and lay half dead upon the floor. The owner of the mansion, hearing
the noise, and well knowing the reason, though he pretended ignorance,
asked, “What was the matter?” “Oh!” groaned the suffering thief,
“_False_ words have deceived me.” In the morning he was taken
before the judge, and afterwards suspended on a cross.
_Application_
My beloved, the thief is the devil; the house is the human heart. The
man is a good prelate, and his wife is the church.
To sum up, then, it would appear that the humorous muse in the Middle
Ages concerned herself chiefly with scattering and disseminating moral
lessons, which, because of the superiority of the teachers to the
taught, showed up an ignorance that was laughable.
The fables and maxims that had been passed from mouth to mouth were put
into writing and translated into various tongues.
The Sanscrit or Hindoo stories were undoubtedly the oldest and from
them were taken the Arabic and Persian tales. These drifted into Europe
and took a proper place among the literatures of the world.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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