"Would it be wicked? When the sheep is so black, when he refuses to be
washed, and brings disgrace on innocent heads? There is no hope for me,
Miss Beverley; a month more, or a month less, that's the only question
that remains. Sea air is supposed to be good, and sitting at home
people think _only_ of the air, and forget the other incidents of life
on shipboard, which are _not_ conducive to the welfare of a man
suffering from my--complaints! I am worse than when we sailed. Shall
grow worse every day. Doubly infected, you see! A leper to be
shunned."
He stared at her keenly, his mouth twisted by the bitter mockery of a
smile. There was no sign of softening on his face, rather did he appear
to sneer at the puny efforts which had been made on his behalf. He had
spoken of her as a "beautiful girl," but in a manner so impersonal as to
rob the words of flattery. Katrine turned her head aside, unable to
meet that gaze, and sat silent, gazing out to sea. For a long quarter
of an hour neither spoke a word, but the silence was charged. Each felt
the influence of the other's thoughts, divined the other's sentiments.
At a certain moment they turned simultaneously to look into each other's
eyes, and in this last look was kindness and comprehension.
"Miss Beverley," said the man, "you are a good woman. You have done me
good, though not in the way you intended. I shall drink as much as
ever, understand that! but you've done me good. If you are brave enough
to defy convention by giving a little of your time to a prodigal, I'll
take what I can get, and for the rest--keep out of your way! But you
have only to say a word--"
Katrine held out her hand.
"I don't want to say it. It is nothing to me what people think. Come
and talk to me whenever you feel inclined. I have no friends on board,
but at Port Said a man is joining the ship who is in the same regiment
as my host, and he is supposed to look after me for the rest of the
voyage. I hope we shall _both_ like him! We could sit together and
have more interesting talks. Men get tired of womaney subjects."
"Ah," he said flatly, "that's good! I'm glad you will have some one.
You are beautiful, you know. You oughtn't to be alone."
Again the impersonal tone minimised the words. Katrine realised that as
a woman she had no personality for the man; she was merely a shape--a
picture; even his gratitude was a lifeless thing; the man's power of
feeling, of resistance, was exhausted. It was indeed, as he had said,
"too late."
CHAPTER TWENTY ONE.
The ship dropped anchor in the harbour of Port Said early in the
morning, and almost immediately afterwards four large coal barges,
lashed together, were towed towards her, with a not unmusical chanting
of "Oola! Oola! Oola!" from their Arab crew.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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