He met Katrine's eyes, widely questioning, and replied with a defiant flash. "You are astonished! You did not associate romance with such a death's head of a man! Nevertheless it is true. There was a woman: _one_ woman, only one! I worshipped her for five long years; I worship her still, but all the same I did her to death. Oh, let me explain! It was nothing actionable. I am not a prisoner fleeing from justice. There is no escape from the court before which I shall be tried. I would have killed myself a thousand times over sooner than have lifted a hand against her. She was my wife, you see, and I loved her, but I broke her heart. I believed that in the joy of her I could break loose from the devil which possessed me. I _did_ go free for a few months, and she married me, poor child! knowing nothing. Then, _He_ came back, mightier than before. The first time she saw me--I may live through a thousand hells, and know nothing more awful than the memory of those eyes! She told me herself, weeping in my arms the next day, that she could not love, she could not even endure, `_that man_!' If he came back--if she saw him again.--I promised; I swore. A hundred times over I promised and a hundred times over I failed, and her love changed to fear, fear and dread, and a shrinking of flesh. She was a frail thing, and she lived in terror of `_that man_.' In terror of him she died. When she drew her last breath he was drunk, lying helpless downstairs--" "Oh, don't!" gasped Katrine painfully. "_Don't_ tell me! I didn't ask.--I don't want to hear... Don't remind yourself--" "_Remind_! Do you think I can forget? I am not harrowing myself by conjuring up sleeping ghosts. That kind of ghost never sleeps. It makes no difference to me whether I speak of it, or am silent. I have told you for--" he turned towards her with a twisted smile, "_your own sake_! You are a good girl, but crude. When you have had time to think for yourself, you'll make a fine woman. You've been living in a shell. _Let yourself go_! Forget what you've been taught, and think things out for yourself. Meantime, I appreciate your good intentions, but--_leave me alone_!" Suddenly his eyes blazed. "Great Heavens! If She couldn't help me, what can _you_ do!" He wheeled round and strode away, leaving Katrine to pass through some of the most poignant moments of her life. Never before had she come into such intimate touch with human misery. Compared with this anguish of remorse, Martin's grief over the loss of his girl wife seemed a sacred and beautiful thing. Never before had she realised at once so overpowering a longing to help, and so profound a conviction of helplessness. To be of use to a soul in such straits, one must needs have suffered also, have struggled, and overcome: have risen to a height far beyond that on which she now stood. Katrine knew it, acknowledged it to her own soul, with a humility which was in itself a prayer.