There has just been filed at Pottsville, Pennsylvania, the oddest instrument ever recorded in that city: the document conveys land for the erection of a new church, but stipulates that when the church is erected, a certain pastor shall be forever debarred from holding an office or preaching a sermon in the building, and that a specified elder shall also be precluded from holding an office. ACCURACY IN WRITING Few realize the value of accuracy in testamentary and other writings. The other day there appeared a decision by the Supreme Court of Missouri, upsetting a sale, where the judges gravely decided that “Mike” did not mean “Michael”; and one of the arguments in reaching this result was, that to have called Michael Angelo, “Mike” Angelo, would have been a sacrilege to the memory of the great painter. A WILL OF THE FUTURE If the late prevailing high prices for meat continue, _Puck_ of New York suggests the following will: “In the name of God, Amen! I, John Doe, in the City of Jersey, County of Hudson, State of New Jersey, being of sound mind and memory, do hereby make, publish, and declare this my Last Will and Testament in manner following, that is to say: “FIRST, _I bequeath to my eldest son_, JOHN, _two juicy porterhouse steaks now in the custody of the Arctic Storage Company_; “SECOND, _I leave to my son_, WILFRED, _a leg of spring lamb now stored with the Freezem Warehouse_; “THIRD, _I leave to my daughter six pounds of veal chops locked in the refrigerator in the cellar beneath my residence, the combination for the lock of which is held by the Columbia Trust Company. It is also my desire that the executors have these chops frenched before turning same over to the legatee_; “FOURTH, _I leave to my mother-in-law one haslet, which will be delivered to her upon application at either the Morris or Swift beef houses_. “LASTLY, _I hereby nominate_ RICHARD ROE, _the wholesale butcher_, MORRIS MOE, _the beef-trust magnate, and_ PAUL POE, _meat manipulator, to be executors of this my last will and testament, hereby revoking all former wills by me made_. “In Witness Whereof, I have hereunto set my hand and seal, the eighth day of May in the year of our Lord, Nineteen Hundred and Ten. “_F. P. Pitzer._” [Seal] DOING HIS DUTY The farmer marched into the little grocer’s shop with a firm step. “I want that tub of butter,” he said, “and that lot of sugar, and all that other stuff.” “Good gracious!” said the widow who kept the shop. “Whatever do you want with all them goods?” “I dunno,” said the farmer, scratching his head; “but, you see, I’m the executor of your husband’s will, and the lawyers told me I was to carry out the provisions.” MAJOR ANDRÉ’S REQUEST OF WASHINGTON “Tappan, the 1st October, 1780. “Sir.