Hence, I took my courage in both hands and slowly crossed the court, still further slackening my pace in ascending the steps of the ancient residence of the Ducs de Lévis, both fearing and dreading to reach the top. I rang the bell, and in answer a servant appeared. Doffing my tri-cornered hat, considerably too big for me, with that air of humility which renders the man down on his luck so awkward, I asked him, in a voice which I tried in vain to steady, if I might see Mme. Récamier. From the way in which he began to ‘take stock’ of me, I imagined that he was in the habit of seeing many needy creatures steer for this haven, and that, naturally, he classed me among the crowd of the wretched which each day solicited the inexhaustible charity of his mistress. ‘I’ll see if madame is at home,’ he said; ‘but what name shall I say?’ I gave him mine, and, apparently satisfied on that point, he bade me take a seat. A few moments passed, and Joseph--that was the name of the domestic--did not return. Devoured with anxiety, I rose from the seat, which offered no rest, and strode up and down the large hall, paved with marble and hung with sombre portraits, paintings of another age, worn out like the past, forgotten like the past, and on the faces of which I tried in vain to catch a favourable smile. Every one knows with what minute attention a man coming to ask a favour scans the spot where he awaits his fate. At last Joseph came back; but it was no longer the semi-benevolent face that welcomed me on my entrance. ‘Madame is very sorry not to be able to see you to-day, monsieur. Not having the honour of your acquaintance, she would ask you to write to her about the motive of your visit.’ ‘Not know me!’ my lips painfully murmured, stupefied. I felt like one suddenly blinded. Everything in this world seemed to fail me at once--the present, the future, friendship, and my courage withal. Tears, but badly hidden by the brim of my hat, coursed down my cheeks. At sixteen one does still shed tears. One has not acquired the courage which is only learned in the school of adversity.