Anecdotes of the late Samuel Johnson, LL.D.: During the Last Twenty Years of His LifePiozzi, Hester Lynch
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Anecdotes of the late Samuel Johnson, LL.D.: During the Last Twenty Years of His Life
Piozzi, Hester Lynch
Johnson, Samuel, 1709-1784
Johnson said always, "that the world was well constructed, but that the
particular people disgraced the elegance and beauty of the general
fabric." In the same manner I was relating once to him how Dr. Collier
observed that the love one bore to children was from the anticipation
one's mind made while one contemplated them. "We hope," says he, "that
they will sometime make wise men or amiable women; and we suffer 'em to
take up our affection beforehand. One cannot love _lumps of flesh_, and
little infants are nothing more." "On the contrary," says Johnson, "one
can scarcely help wishing, while one fondles a baby, that it may never
live to become a man; for it is so probable that when he becomes a man,
he should be sure to end in a scoundrel." Girls were less displeasing to
him; "for as their temptations were fewer," he said, "their virtue in
this life, and happiness in the next, were less improbable; and he
loved," he said, "to see a knot of little misses dearly."
Needlework had a strenuous approver in Dr. Johnson, who said "that one of
the great felicities of female life was the general consent of the world
that they might amuse themselves with petty occupations, which
contributed to the lengthening their lives, and preserving their minds in
a state of sanity." "A man cannot hem a pocket-handkerchief," said a
lady of quality to him one day, "and so he runs mad, and torments his
family and friends." The expression struck him exceedingly, and when one
acquaintance grew troublesome, and another unhealthy, he used to quote
Lady Frances's observation, "That a man cannot hem a
pocket-handkerchief."
The nice people found no mercy from Mr. Johnson; such, I mean, as can
only dine at four o'clock, who cannot bear to be waked at an unusual
hour, or miss a stated meal without inconvenience. _He_ had no such
prejudices himself, and with difficulty forgave them in another.
"Delicacy does not surely consist," says he, "in impossibility to be
pleased, and that is false dignity indeed which is content to depend upon
others."
The saying of the old philosopher who observes, "That he who wants least
is most like the gods, who want nothing," was a favourite sentence with
Dr. Johnson, who on his own part required less attendance, sick or well,
than ever I saw any human creature. Conversation was all he required to
make him happy; and when he would have tea made at two o'clock in the
morning, it was only that there might be a certainty of detaining his
companions round him. On that principle it was that he preferred winter
to summer, when the heat of the weather gave people an excuse to stroll
about and walk for pleasure in the shade, while he wished to sit still on
a chair and chat day after day, till somebody proposed a drive in the
coach, and that was the most delicious moment of his life. "But the
carriage must stop some time," he said, "and the people would come home
at last," so his pleasure was of short duration.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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