Country life -- Fiction; Vicars, Parochial -- England -- Fiction
“Perhaps, then, you had better stay with Gerard.”
“I will, sir; for I think she wants to speak to you alone.”
I entered her chamber. A candle stood on a chest of drawers, and its
light fell on her face, once more flushed in those two spots with the
glow of the unseen fire of disease. Her eyes, too, glittered again, but
the fierceness was gone, and only the suffering remained. I drew a
chair beside her, and took her hand. She yielded it willingly, even
returned the pressure of kindness which I offered to the thin trembling
fingers.
“You are too good, sir,” she said. “I want to tell you all. He promised
to marry me, I believed him. But I did very wrong. And I have been a
bad mother, for I could not keep from seeing his face in Gerard’s.
Gerard was the name he told me to call him when I had to write to him,
and so I named the little darling Gerard. How is he, sir?”
“Doing nicely,” I replied. “I do not think you need be at all uneasy
about him now.”
“Thank God. I forgive his father now with all my heart. I feel it
easier since I saw how wicked I could be myself. And I feel it easier,
too, that I have not long to live. I forgive him with all my heart, and
I will take no revenge. I will not tell one who he is. I have never
told any one yet. But I will tell you. His name is George
Everard—Captain Everard. I came to know him when I was apprenticed at
Addicehead. I would not tell you, sir, if I did not know that you will
not tell any one. I know you so well that I will not ask you not. I saw
him yesterday, and it drove me wild. But it is all over now. My heart
feels so cool now. Do you think God will forgive me?”
Without one word of my own, I took out my pocket Testament and read
these words:—
“For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also
forgive you.”
Then I read to her, from the seventh chapter of St Luke’s Gospel, the
story of the woman who was a sinner and came to Jesus in Simon’s house,
that she might see how the Lord himself thought and felt about such.
When I had finished, I found that she was gently weeping, and so I left
her, and resumed my place beside the boy. I told Thomas that he had
better not go near her just yet. So we sat in silence together for a
while, during which I felt so weary and benumbed, that I neither cared
to resume my former train of thought, nor to enter upon the new one
suggested by the confession of Catherine. I believe I must have fallen
asleep in my chair, for I suddenly returned to consciousness at a cry
from Gerard. I started up, and there was the child fast asleep, but
standing on his feet in his crib, pushing with his hands from before
him, as if resisting some one, and crying—
“Don’t. Don’t. Go away, man. Mammy! Mr Walton!”
I took him in my arms, and kissed him, and laid him down again; and he
lay as still as if he had never moved. At the same moment, Thomas came
again into the room.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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