She went a step or two towards him. She seemed to speak by a power
outside herself. “In our maddest moments your eyes are still measuring
me. You never lose yourself. . . . You should not have forced me to
speak of this. I see that all the things I ordinarily say are mere
nonsense—like the noises made by savages to keep devils off. . . . You
have roused a fever in me that is burning me up. . . . But . . . but
. . . I don’t want to have a child. . . .”
“Oh, for Heaven’s sake!” exclaimed Joe, startled, showing his teeth.
The jangling voice recalled her to herself, wincing. She walked unevenly
up and down. “The nonsense that they teach girls!” she murmured. “It
made a rebel of me. I had prudence and obedience and chastity thrust
down my throat until I fell in love with everything that was reckless
and bad. I understood the devil worshippers. That’s how you got
me. . . .”
“I don’t care how I got you,” said Joe with a secret smile.
She came to a stop. Her eyes were widely distended and quite unseeing.
She made vague passes with her hand in the effort to express the
inexpressible. “But all that stuff I laughed at . . . religion . . . all
that stuff . . . is getting back at me . . . I mean may be it is . . .
all kinds of things are working inside me . . . maybe there’s something
in it. . . .”
“You’re talking wildly!” said Joe.
She shook her head. “I never got so close to naming it before . . . the
thing you don’t talk about . . .”
“Come here,” said Joe, half contemptuously.
She shook her head inattentively. “Let me be. . . .”
He stood up. “Come here!” he said, peremptorily.
She looked at him reluctantly—and lost herself. A deep blush overspread
her pale skin; her face became irradiated with a confused and imploring
smile. She went to him slowly; shamed and rapturous.
Joe had dropped back into the big chair. Placing his hands on her
shoulders, he pressed her down to her knees at his feet. “Put your arms
around my neck,” he commanded.
She obeyed. He pressed his lips to hers.
“Now . . . _now_ tell me if there is anything in life that matters
beside this,” he said breathlessly.
“No! No! No!” she whispered passionately. “I want only you!”
“You see, you’ll have to marry me!”
“No, Joe!”
“But I say you shall!”
VII
On a mild, bright afternoon, Elaine and Wilfred ran down the steps of
the Sturges house, and turned east. Wilfred had enjoined Elaine to dress
plainly; and she was wearing a severe tweed coat, and an inconspicuous
hat bound round with a veil. Thus clad, her brave air was more apparent
than ever. Wilfred’s heart beat high. Leaving behind them the big house
which typified Elaine’s crowded exotic life, he felt for the first time
that he had her to himself. Looking at her, he thought: It is impossible
that Joe could reach his grimy paw so high! As usual, I have been
tormenting myself without reason.
“Now elucidate the mystery,” said Elaine. “Where are we going?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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