Black humor; City and town life -- Fiction; Intellectuals -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction; Satire
Mrs. Viveash had turned up towards the northern side of the square and
was almost at its north-western corner when, with a thrill of genuine
delight, with a sense of the most profound relief she saw a familiar
figure, running down the steps of the London Library.
“Theodore!” she hallooed faintly but penetratingly, from her inward
death-bed. “Gumbril!” She waved her parasol.
Gumbril halted, looked round, came smiling to meet her. “How
delightful,” he said, “but how unfortunate.”
“Why unfortunate?” asked Mrs. Viveash. “Am I of evil omen?”
“Unfortunate,” Gumbril explained, “because I’ve got to catch a train and
can’t profit by this meeting.”
“Ah no, Theodore,” said Mrs. Viveash, “you’re not going to catch a
train. You’re going to come and lunch with me. Providence has decreed
it. You can’t say no to Providence.”
“I must,” Gumbril shook his head. “I’ve said yes to somebody else.”
“To whom?”
“Ah!” said Gumbril, with a coy and saucy mysteriousness.
“And where are you going in your famous train?”
“Ah again,” Gumbril answered.
“How intolerably tiresome and silly you are!” Mrs. Viveash declared.
“One would think you were a sixteen-year-old schoolboy going out for his
first assignation with a shop girl. At your age, Gumbril!” She shook her
head, smiled agonizingly and with contempt. “Who is she? What sordid
pick-up?”
“Not sordid in the least,” protested Gumbril.
“But decidedly a pick-up. Eh?” A banana-skin was lying, like a
bedraggled starfish, in the gutter, just in front of where they were
standing. Mrs. Viveash stepped forward and with the point of her parasol
lifted it carefully up and offered it to her companion.
“_Merci_,” Gumbril bowed.
She tossed the skin back again into the gutter. “In any case,” she said,
“the young lady can wait while we have luncheon.”
Gumbril shook his head. “I’ve made the arrangement,” he said. Emily’s
letter was in his pocket. She had taken the loveliest cottage just out
of Robertsbridge, in Sussex. Ah, but the loveliest imaginable. For the
whole summer. He could come and see her there. He had telegraphed that
he would come to-day, this afternoon, by the two o’clock from Charing
Cross.
Mrs. Viveash took him by the elbow. “Come along,” she said. “There’s a
post office in that passage going from Jermyn Street to Piccadilly. You
can wire from there your infinite regrets. These things always improve
with a little keeping. There will be raptures when you _do_ go
to-morrow.”
Gumbril allowed himself to be led along. “What an insufferable woman you
are,” he said, laughing.
“Instead of being grateful to me for asking you to luncheon!”
“Oh, I am grateful,” said Gumbril. “And astonished.”
He looked at her. Mrs. Viveash smiled and fixed him for a moment with
her pale, untroubled eyes.... She said nothing.
“Still,” Gumbril went on, “I must be at Charing Cross by two, you know.”
“But we’re lunching at Verrey’s.”
Gumbril shook his head.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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