"Our calmness in the face of death seemed to terrify those men, and the chief, furious at their hesitation, gave the order again: 'Fire! Fire!' At last they fired. Even then I could hear our dear Professor Pagratian saying, 'Jesus, Jesus, we are coming to Thee!' Then I fainted away." The Pagratian children were sobbing: "Papa, papa, what shall we do without you?" "What miracle prevented your being killed like the others?" asked Nizam. "It really was a miracle. My swoon only lasted a few minutes, and when I came to myself, the Kurds were killing the women and children. I had strength enough to drag myself a little way and hide behind a pile of wood, then the sights all around were so terrible that I fainted again. After a long time I regained consciousness; it was broad daylight, and the courtyard was deserted. You know already how they took me in at the American hospital, and took care of me till I was healed." CHAPTER XXI THE MARTYRDOM OF THE ARMENIANS The college year closed in sadness. There was a new English teacher in the place of Professor Piralian, who had been seriously wounded at Adana and, for the time being, was unable to conduct his classes. Professor Pagratian's successor, an Armenian of Aintab, was still in America, not to return before the autumn term; Dr. Mills took his work in the meantime. Archag could not forget the painful events in which he had participated; he was no longer his old self, but always under a cloud. He avoided the companionship of the students and spent his spare time with his sister. Nizam was still with the Pagratians, waiting until the college examinations were over, so that she might have her brothers' escort on the journey home. Archag's sadness was due not only to the death of his brother-in-law and of the other Armenians; no, there was a deeper reason. His faith in God had been shaken, as well as his confidence in human nature. "Is it possible," he asked himself, "that a God of kindness, a Father who loves His children tenderly, can permit such horrors?" "No," whispered the tempter in his ear, "the God whom you adore is hard and inflexible; in His sight men are no more than grains of sand, and He is quite indifferent to our fate." The lad was greatly depressed by these thoughts, and felt a growing distaste for life. Nizam and Garabed, to whom he confided his doubts, could not succeed in consoling him. "We must accept the will of God," his sister would say, "death ought not to be a terror, but a joy, for it marks the beginning of our eternal life. In Paradise there will be no more tears, no more sorrow nor parting." But these words did not convince him, and Nizam's sadness increased as she marked this change in her brother. One evening, as he was returning from a solitary walk, he met Mrs. Spencer. He would have passed on, but she stopped him: