On the next evening after that described in the last chapter, all the dwellers at the cottage assembled again in Hatasa’s room, by her request, to hold the usual evening service; for the lady had seldom quitted her bed, and she remained deplorably weak, suffering with continual pain in her lungs, the result, perhaps, of her great exposure during the storm, and of the terrible depression of spirits that succeeded it. All through the pagan world, the only known refuge from hopeless sorrow was suicide, and the idea of self-destruction was ever present to her. Perhaps her maternal affection for Theckla alone deterred her from putting an end to her life; for it was not regarded by the heathen as cowardly, criminal, or even immoral, to seek that refuge from misfortune. Cato did it; Seneca approved of it; Epictetus, Aurelius, and all the great lights of pagan antiquity regarded self-immolation as a matter of choice, and often as an act of wisdom. But, from the moment in which Hatasa had been informed that the kind friends who surrounded her were Christians, she felt a desire to know more of them, and of their peculiar religion, strong enough to give her a new interest in life; and she had requested Ammonius to have the service in her room, and told him that, although she was too weak to take any part in their conversation about Christianity, she desired to hear himself and Am-nem-hat discuss any topic pertaining thereto in which they were interested. So, after the usual exercises of reading and prayer, the whole family remained together. The ancient remarked to Ammonius that during the day he had pondered much upon the things spoken of in their former conversation, and suggested, as a difficulty in the way of the acceptance of Christianity, something like the following: "I can understand how a kind and merciful God might lay down certain rules of action, and require obedience to his laws, under whatever penalties he might choose to impose; but it seemeth to me that to require one _to believe_, as the sole condition of justification, is arbitrary and unjust. Suppose that one hath some natural bent of mind, or hath been reared and educated in some such way that it is hard, perhaps impossible, for him to believe; yet thy books say: ’Believe and live; he that believeth not is condemned already.’ Is not this an arbitrary demand for faith; and doth it not do violence to that very autonomy of the will which thou sayest Jesus himself always respected and venerated?" "Thou dost somewhat mistake the matter," said Ammonius. "The Lord does not demand our faith; he simply stateth an actual fact, which is, that the believer is justified by faith, and that he who does not believe is condemned already." "I hardly understand what thou sayest: ’he simply stateth an actual fact.’"