"Ask Mamma"; or, The Richest Commoner In EnglandSurtees, Robert Smith
General
"Ask Mamma"; or, The Richest Commoner In England
Surtees, Robert Smith
England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Fox hunting -- Fiction
When Sir Moses returned, at the end of an hour or so, he found
one of the old tenants of the estate, Jacky Hindmarch, in the
chair. Jacky was one of the real scratching order of farmers, and
ought to be preserved at Madame Tussaud’s or the British Museum,
for the information of future ages. To see him in the fields,
with his crownless hat and tattered clothes, he was more like a
scare-crow than a farmer; though, thanks to the influence of
cheap finery, he turned out very shiney and satiney on a Sunday.
Jacky had seventy acres of land,—fifty acres of arable and twenty
acres of grass, which latter he complimented with an annual
mowing without giving it any manure in return, thus robbing his
pastures to feed his fallows,—if, indeed, he did not rob both by
selling the manure off his farm altogether. Still Jacky was
reckoned a cute fellow among his compatriots. He had graduated in
the Insolvent Debtors’ Court to evade his former landlord’s
claims, and emerged from gaol with a good stock of bad law
engrafted on his innate knavery. In addition to this, Jacky, when
a hind, had nearly had to hold up his hand at Quarter Sessions
for stealing his master’s corn, which he effected in a very
ingenious way:—The granary being above Jacky’s stable, he bored a
hole through the floor, to which he affixed a stocking; and,
having drawn as much corn as he required, he stopped the hole up
with a plug until he wanted a fresh supply. The farmer—one Mr.
Podmore—at length smelt a rat; but giving Jacky in charge rather
prematurely, he failed in substantiating the accusation, when the
latter, acting “under advice,” brought an action against Podmore,
which ended in a compromise, Podmore having to pay Jacky twenty
pounds for robbing him! This money, coupled with the savings of a
virtuous young woman he presently espoused, and who had made free
with the produce of her master’s dairy, enabled Jacky to take the
farm off which he passed through the Insolvent Debtors’ Court, on
to the Pangburn Park estate, where he was generally known by the
name of Lawyer Hindmarch.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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