There was a silence. She lay watching him for a moment longer while
the smile in her eyes slowly died out. Then, all in a moment, a swift
change altered her expression; and she sat up on the couch, supporting
herself on both hands.
"What is happening to you, Clive!" she said almost breathlessly.
"Nothing new."
"What do you mean?"
"Shall I tell you?"
"Of course."
"Then,"--but he could not say it. He had no business to, and he knew
it. It was the one thing he could refrain from saying, for her sake;
the one service he could now render her.
He sat staring into space, the iron grimness of self-control locking
every fetter that he wore--must always wear now.
She waited, her eyes intent on his face, her colour high, heart rapid.
"What had you to say to me?" she asked, breaking the silence.
He forced a laugh: "Nothing--except that sometimes being with you
again makes me--very contented--"
"Is that what you had to say?"
"Yes. I told you it was nothing new."
She lowered her gaze and remained silent for a moment, apparently
considering what he had said. Then the uplifted candour of her eyes
questioned him again:
"You don't imagine yourself in love with me again, do you, Clive?"
"No."
"Nothing like that could happen to you again, could it?... Because it
has not yet happened to me. It couldn't.... And it would be too--too
ghastly if you--if anything--"
"Don't talk about it that way!" he said sharply. "If it _did_
happen--what of it?"... He forced a smile. "But it won't happen....
Things like that don't happen to people like you and me. We care too
much for each other, don't we, Athalie?"
"Yes.... It would be terrible.... I don't know why I put such ideas
into your head--or into my own. But you--there was something in your
expression.... Oh, Clive, dear, it _couldn't_ happen to you, could
it?"
She leaned forward impulsively and put both hands on his shoulders,
gazing into his eyes, searching them fearfully for any trace of what
she thought for a moment she had seen in them.
He said gaily enough: "No fear, dear. I'm exactly what I always have
been. I'll always be what you want me to be, Athalie."
"I know.... But if ever--"
"No, no! Nothing can ever happen to worry you--"
"But if--"
"Nothing shall happen!"
"I know. But if ever it does--"
"It won't."
"Oh, Clive, listen! If it _does_ happen to you, what will you do?"
"Do?"
"Yes.... If it does happen, what will you do, Clive?"
"But--"
"Answer me!"
"I--"
"Please answer me. What will you do about it?"
"Nothing," he said, flushing.
"Why not?"
"Why not? What is there--what would there be to do? What could I have
to say to you if--"
"You could say that you loved me--if you did."
"To what purpose?" he demanded, red and astonished.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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