Gerald, however, was much stronger than his nerves. He could see his own
case, even with a pulse at ninety, as well as another man's. And his
will was firmer than might have been thought. He knew something of a
human man's constitution, how it can circumvent a man, or how a man,
well on his guard, can circumvent it. He formed the project of
interrupting his visits to the Hermitage.
After this resolution he regarded those returns of earth-born desire for
Aurora's balmy touch and tranquilizing neighborhood as a man who had
taken an heroic and sure remedy against ague might regard the
fluctuations in his body of heat and cold continuing still for a little
while. As to how Aurora would take his defection, all should be managed
with so much art and politeness that the most sensitive could not be
hurt. By the time the new important work which he would make his excuse
was accomplished, his cure would have been accomplished as well.
Meanwhile, each time the door-bell rang--it was not often,
certainly--his attention was taken from his book, and he listened. And
so, on Mlle. Durand's French afternoon, Gerald, having heard the bell,
was listening, but with his face to the fire and his back to the door.
When Giovanna knocked, "Forward!" he said, without turning. The door
opened.
"_C'è quella signora._" "There is that lady," dubiously announced
Giovanna.
Gerald turned, and beheld that lady filling the doorway.
Then it was as if a bright trumpet-blast of reality, breaking upon a bad
dream, dispelled it; or as if a fresh wind, blowing over stagnant water,
swept away the cloud of noxious gnats. All he had latterly been thinking
and feeling seemed to Gerald insane, sickly, the instant he beheld
Aurora's comradely smile. He was ashamed; he found himself on the verge
of stupid, unexplainable tears.
"Well!" said Aurora.
At the sound they were placed back on the exact footing of their last
meeting, before thinking and conjecturing about each other in absence
had built up between them barriers of illusion.
"Well!" he said, but less pleasantly, because he was mortified by the
awareness of himself as an uninviting sight, with his old dressing-gown,
neglected beard, and the unpicturesque manifestations of a cold.
But Aurora's face was reassuring; she did not confuse him with the
accidents of his dressing-gown and beard and cold. Aurora's face beamed,
so much was she rejoicing in her own excellent sense, which had told her
that one look at each other would do a thousand times more to make
things right between them than innumerable letters could have done.
"I didn't know what to think," she said, "so I came to find out. First
I'd think you were mad at me, then I'd think you had gone away and
written me, and the letter hadn't reached me, Gaetano had lost it on the
road. Then I'd think you might be sick, and there was nobody to let your
friends know. I don't know what I didn't think of. What made you not
send me word?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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