'Deeply indebted, indeed!' exclaimed he in a fervid tone, taking a
chair and playing with his hat between his knees, in his previous
fashion when beginning one of his monologues. 'When I began "Faith
and Love" I worked for weeks and months and years, having but one
thought, how to give artistic rendering to the great idea of the
Renascence of Wonder in Art symbolised in the vignette in your
father's third edition. I was very poor then; but to live upon bread
and water and paint a great picture, and know that you are being
watched by loving eyes above,--there is no joy like that. I found a
model--a fine and beautiful woman, the same magnificent blonde who
sat for so many of the Master's greatest pictures. For a long time my
work delighted me; but after awhile a suspicion, and then a sickening
dread, came upon me that all was not well with the picture. And then
the withering truth broke in upon me, the scales fell from my
eyes--the model's face was beautiful, but it was not right; the
expression I wanted was as far off as ever; there was but one right
expression in the world, and that I could not find. Ah! is there any
pain like that of discovering that all the toil of years has been in
vain, that the best you can do--the best that the spiritual world
permits you to do--is as far off the goal as when you began?'
'And so you failed after all, Mr. Wilderspin?' I said, anxious to get
him away so that I might talk to Cyril alone upon the one subject at
my heart.
'I told the model I should want her no more,' said Wilderspin, 'and
for two days and nights I sat in the studio in a dream, and could get
nothing to pass my lips but bread and water. Then it was that Mary
Wilderspin, my mother, remembered me, blessed me--sent me a
spiritual body--'
'For God's sake!' I whispered to Cyril, 'take the good madman away;
you don't know how his prattle harrows me just now.'
'Ah! never,' said Wilderspin, 'shall I forget that sunny morning when
was first revealed to me--'
'My dear fellow,' said Cyril, 'to tell the adventures of that sunny
morning would, as I know from experience, keep us here for the next
three hours. So, as I must not miss my train, and as you cannot spare
a second from "Ruth and Boaz," come along.'
While I was accompanying them through the corridors of the hotel,
Cyril said: 'You say he is not in love with his model? Don't you see
the sulky looks he gives me? I was the innocent cause of an unlucky
catastrophe with her. I'll tell you about that, however, another
time. Good-bye; I'm off to Paris.'
'When you return to London,' I said to Cyril, 'I wish to consult you
upon, a matter that concerns me deeply.'
II
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account