How am I running on!--My spirits are flutter'd:--I begin where I should end, and end where I should begin.--Behold me, dearest Madam, just parted from my Hampshire friends,--silent and in tears, plac'd by the side of my miscreant conductor.--You know, my Lady, this specious man _can_ make himself vastly entertaining: he strove to render his conversation particularly so, on our first setting out. We had travell'd several stages without varying the subject, which was that of our intended tour, when I said I hop'd it would conquer Mrs. Smith's melancholy for the death of her brother.--How did his answer change him in a moment from the _most_ agreeable to the _most_ disgustful of his sex! My wife, Miss Warley, with a leer that made him look dreadful, wants your charming sprightliness:--it is a curs'd thing to be connected with a gloomy woman:-- _Gloomy_, Sir! casting at him a look of disdain; do you call mildness, complacency, and evenness of temper, _gloomy?_ She is much altered, Madam;--is grown old and peevish;--her health is bad;--she cannot live long. Mrs. Smith can never be _peevish_, Sir;--and as to her _age_, I thought it pretty near your _own_. No, no, Madam, you are quite mistaken; I am at least five years younger. Five years, Sir! what are five years at _your_ time of life! Come, come, Miss Warley, laying his huge paw on my hand, and in a tone of voice that shew'd him heartily nettled;--even at _my_ time of life I can admire a beautiful young Lady.--If my wife should die,--_old as I am_--men _older_ than myself, with half my estate, have married some of the finest women in the kingdom. Very likely, Sir;--but then it is to be suppos'd the characters of _such_ men have been particularly amiable,--No man or woman of honour can esteem another whose principles are doubtful.