Moreover there might have been ways out of it, of which she knew
nothing. But surrounded as she was by threatening powers—by Lady
Honoria threatening actions in the Courts on one side, by Owen Davies
threatening exposure on another, by Elizabeth ready and willing to give
the most damning evidence on the third, to Beatrice the worst
consequences seemed an absolutely necessary sequence. Then there was
her own conscience arrayed against her. This particular charge was a
lie, but it was not a lie that she loved Geoffrey, and to her the two
things seemed very much the same thing. Hers was not a mind to draw
fine distinctions in such matters. _Se posuit ut culpabilem_: she
“placed herself as guilty,” as the old Court rolls put it in miserable
Latin, and this sense of guilt disarmed her. She did not realise the
enormous difference recognised by the whole civilised world between
thought and act, between disposing mind and inculpating deed. Beatrice
looked at the question more from the scriptural point of view,
remembering that in the Bible such fine divisions are expressly stated
to be distinctions without a difference.
Had she gone to Geoffrey and told him her whole story it is probable
that he would have defied the conspiracy, faced it out, and possibly
come off victorious. But, with that deadly reticence of which women
alone are capable, this she did not and would not do. Sweet loving
woman that she was, she would not burden him with her sorrows, she
would bear them alone—little reckoning that thereby she was laying up a
far, far heavier load for him to carry through all his days.
So Beatrice accepted the statements of the plaintiff’s attorney for
gospel truth, and from that false standpoint she drew her auguries.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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