She came back filled with such thoughts as might well strike the heart
of a woman about to do the thing she had decreed. The refreshment bar
was open now, and she went to it, and bought a cup of coffee and some
bread and butter. Then she took her ticket, not to Bryngelly or to
Coed, but to the station on this side of Bryngelly, and three miles
from it. She would run less risk of being noticed there. The train was
shunted up; she took her seat in it. Just as it was starting, an early
newspaper boy came along, yawning. Beatrice bought a copy of the
_Standard_, out of the one and threepence that was left of her money,
and opened it at the sheet containing the leading articles. The first
one began, “The most powerful, closely reasoned, and eloquent speech
made last night by Mr. Bingham, the Member for Pillham, will, we feel
certain, produce as great an effect on the country as it did in the
House of Commons. We welcome it, not only on account of its value as a
contribution to the polemics of the Irish Question, but as a positive
proof of what has already been suspected, that the Unionist party has
in Mr. Bingham a young statesman of a very high order indeed, and one
whom remarkable and rapid success at the Bar has not hampered, as is
too often the case, in the larger and less technical field of
politics.”
And so on. Beatrice put the paper down with a smile of triumph.
Geoffrey’s success was splendid and unquestioned. Nothing could stop
him now. During all the long journey she pleased her imagination by
conjuring up picture after picture of that great future of his, in
which she would have no share. And yet he would not forget her; she was
sure of this. Her shadow would go with him from year to year, even to
the end, and at times he might think how proud she would have been
could she be present to record his triumphs. Alas! she did not remember
that when all is lost which can make life beautiful, when the sun has
set, and the spirit gone out of the day, the poor garish lights of our
little victories can but ill atone for the glories that have been.
Happiness and content are frail plants which can only flourish under
fair conditions if at all. Certainly they will not thrive beneath the
gloom and shadow of a pall, and when the heart is dead no triumphs,
however splendid, and no rewards, however great, can compensate for an
utter and irredeemable loss. She never guessed, poor girl, that time
upon time, in the decades to be, Geoffrey would gladly have laid his
honours down in payment for one year of her dear and unforgotten
presence. She was too unselfish; she did not think that a man could
thus prize a woman’s love, and took it for an axiom that to succeed in
life was his one real object—a thing to which so divine a gift as she
had given Geoffrey is as nothing. It was therefore this Juggernaut of
her lover’s career that Beatrice would cast down her life, little
knowing that thereby she must turn the worldly and temporal success,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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