Beauchamp; or, The Error.James, G. P. R. (George Payne Rainsford)
History
Beauchamp; or, The Error.
James, G. P. R. (George Payne Rainsford)
Great Britain -- History -- 18th century -- Fiction
"Though the bullet kept out, plenty of lead has got in, somehow or
other," muttered Sir John Slingsby, as his fellow-magistrate tottered
towards the door; but the baronet was not a bad-hearted man, and,
taking compassion on Mr. Wittingham's state, he followed him with a
large glass of Madeira, insisted upon his drinking it, and supported
him under the right arm to the hall-door, where he delivered him over
to the hands of the butler to put him safely into his carriage. While
this was being effected, Sir John turned round and gazed upon the
figure of Stephen Gimlet, and the two officers who had him in charge;
and if his look was not peculiarly encouraging to the poacher, it
certainly was much less so towards the constables. To say the truth, a
constable was an animal, towards which, for some reason or another,
Sir John Slingsby entertained a great dislike. It is not impossible
that his old roving propensities, and sundry encounters with the
particular kind of officer which was now under his thumb, had
impressed him with a distaste for the whole species; but, assuredly,
had he been called upon to give a Linæan description of the creature,
it would have been: "A two-legged beast of the species hound, made to
be beaten by blackguards and bullied by magistrates."
Waving his hand, therefore, with an air of dignity, over his extended
white waistcoat, he said,--
"Bring him in," and leading the way back to the dining-room, he seated
himself in his great chair, supported on either side by decanters; and
while the constables were entering, and taking up a position before
him, he pushed a bottle either way, to Dr. Miles and Mr. Beauchamp,
saying, in as solemn a tone as if he were delivering sentence of
death, "A bumper, gentlemen, for a toast--now Master Leathersides, why
do you bring this man before me?"
"Why, please your worship's honour," replied the constable, "we
apprehended him for poaching in the streets of Tarningham, and--"
"Halloah!" cried Sir John, "poaching in the streets of Tarningham,
that's a queer place to set springes. Leathersides, you're drunk."
"No please your honour's worship, I arn't," whimpered the constable,
who would at any time rather have been sent for a week to prison, than
be brought up before Sir John Slingsby; "I said, as how we apprehended
him in the streets of Tarningham, not as he was a-poaching there."
"Then where was he poaching when you apprehended him?" demanded Sir
John, half in fun, half in malice, and with a full determination of
puzzling the constable.
"Can't say he was poaching anywhere just then," replied Mr.
Leathersides.
"Then you'd no business to apprehend him," replied the baronet,
"discharge the prisoner, and evacuate the room. Gentlemen, are you
charged? The king, God bless him!" and he swallowed down his glass of
wine, winking his eye to Beauchamp, at what he thought his good joke
against the constables.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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