England -- Fiction; Families -- Fiction; Farms -- Fiction; Older men -- Fiction
“You think it’ll be a soft spot, I’ll be bound, wi’ nowt to do but
set fiddling all day. You reckon you’re going back to things as they
was, only wi’ other folk to see to the work instead o’ you. But if
you’re counting on things being just the same, you’re badly wrong.
Nowt stands still, and I reckon farms is like the rest. What, I doubt
you’ll not know the place when you set eyes on it again! It’ll have
changed a deal in these last two years, same as you’ve changed a deal
yourself. Last man let it down pretty bad; it’s a mercy he broke his
neck afore so long. Landlord’s had a deal to do at it, they say, and
Thomas is that set up he’s for doing a deal more. Ay, it’ll not be
the same farm, no more than Kit Sill’s the same man. You’ll find it
out for yourself afore you’ve been there a week. You’ll be nobbut a
beggar there, you’ll think on, same as here, and owe somebody every
bite. It’ll be another man’s roof over you, as used to be your own.
There’ll be another chap master, telling you what’s what. There’ll be
a woman for missis as baint no wife o’ yours. It’ll be bitter as salt
water washing at your door....”
“Ay, but it’ll be home,” Kit said bravely, holding up his head, and
wondering what devil taught her his secret fear.
“Yon’s what you think—now.” For the first time there was a touch of
sincerity in her voice. Her cold eyes looked away from him through
the open door. “Them as gangs once shouldn’t return. Going back
doesn’t mend things; it nobbut spoils what you’ve had. You’ll likely
spoil summat if you gang ... summat you’ve fettled for yourself....
Your sort doesn’t live in houses made wi’ hands....”
“Summat I’ve fettled?” Kit asked, and his voice shook. “Houses not
made wi’ hands...?” He stared at her, terror and pleading in his
face, and she knew she had beaten him and turned again with a jeer.
“Nay, I doubt there’s summat smittal about daft folks like ye! I
nobbut mean you’ll happen wish yourself back wi’ Marget afore you’ve
done. Not that you’re off yet, so you can just set you down. Folks
wi’ manners wouldn’t be showing themselves that smart.”
“I reckon I’ll stand.”
She shot out a furious hand, thin, with flat finger-tips and curved
nails. “Set down!” she hissed, and he shrank back, but recovered
himself again and stood firm.
“I’ll stand.”
She made a step towards him until their faces almost touched, putting
such intensity into the short approach that his strength seemed to
ebb from him consciously as he watched. She leaned across the table
willing him to obey. “You’ll set down,” she said. “_You’ll set
down!_” And suddenly he gave way as if pulled by a string, crumpling
into a shaking heap of bones. He sat down slowly, grasping the fiddle
so tight that it hurt his hands, and very slowly the tears ran down
his face. For a moment longer she stayed as she was, holding him with
her eyes, terrible as a Juggernaut in the way. And then the trap came
trundling down the street.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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