Begumbagh: A Tale of the Indian MutinyFenn, George Manville
History
Begumbagh: A Tale of the Indian Mutiny
Fenn, George Manville
British -- India -- Fiction; India -- History -- Fiction; India -- History -- Sepoy Rebellion, 1857-1858 -- Fiction
I heard all this in a dim sort of fashion, just as if it was a dream in
the early morning; for I was leaning up against the wall, with my face
laid open and bleeding, and my left arm smashed by a bullet, and nobody
just then took any notice of me, because they were carrying in Captain
Dyer and Harry Lant; while the next minute, the fire was going on hard
and fast; for the mutineers were furious, and I suppose they danced
round the guns in a way that shewed how mad they were about the spiking.
As for me, I did not seem to be in a great deal of pain; but I got
turning over in my mind how well we had done it that morning; and I felt
proud of it all, and glad that Captain Dyer and Harry Lant were brought
in; but all the same what I had heard lay like a load upon me; and
knowing, as I did, that poor Miss Ross had, as it were, sold herself to
save the captain's life, and that she had, in a way of speaking, been
cheated into doing so, I felt that when the opportunity came, I must
tell the captain all I knew. When I had got as far as that with my
thoughts, the dull numbness began to leave me, and everything else was
driven out of my mind by the thought of my wound; and I got asking
myself whether it was going to be very bad, for I thought it was, so
getting up a little, I began to crawl along in the shade towards the
ruined south end of the palace, nobody seeming to notice me.
STORY ONE, CHAPTER SIXTEEN.
I daresay you who read this don't know what the sensation is of having
one arm-bone shivered, and the dead limb swinging helplessly about in
your sleeve, whilst a great miserable sensation comes over you that you
are of no more use--that you are only a cracked pitcher, fit to hold
water no more, but only to be broken up to mend the road with. There
were all those women and children wanting my help, and the help of
hundreds more such as me, and instead of being of use, I knew that I
must be a miserable burden to everybody, and only in the way.
Now, whether man--as some of the great philosophers say--did gradually
get developed from the beast of the field, I'm not going to pretend to
know; but what I do know is this--that, leave him in his natural state,
and when he, for some reason or another, forgets all that has been
taught him, he seems very much like an animal, and acts as such.
It was something after this fashion with me then, for feeling like a
poor brute out of a herd that has been shot by the hunters, I did just
the same as it would--crawled away to find a place where I might hide
myself and lie down and die.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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