_Ghost._ Ma'am, your pardon's granted. My time's but short; but still, before I go, With Miss Juliana I would sport a toe. _Miss S._--With all my heart. What would your ghostship order? _Ghost._--Tell them to play, "Blue bonnets o'er the border." _Apollonicon_ strikes up the country-dance. _Ghost_ leads off with _Miss Smashaway_; the _Captain_ follows with _Mrs. Clipclose_; _Clipclose_, _Mags_, _Snags_, and _Poppleton_ each choose one of the _Captain's Wives_; the _Police_ dance with the _Ladies' Maids_; and the _Pieman_ with "_All-hot_." Twice down the middle, poussette, and form hands round. At the end of the dance, the _Ghost_ vanishes, and the remainder of the _dramatis personæ_ take hands, and advance to the stage-lights. GRAND FINALE--("There's nae luck about the house.") Dad's away, and we may play, Nor dread Old Grumpy's frown; Well may we say, "thrice happy day When Square-toes toddled down!" There's now luck about the house, There's now luck to a'; There's now luck about the house Since grumpy dad's awa! (_Curtain falls amid tremendous applause, and a call for the author._) CRITICAL REMARKS BY AN M.P. "I am not in the habit of frequenting the theatres, nor indeed any public house, except the House of Commons; neither do I pretend to be particularly conversant with the drama: but, by general consent, this play has been declared not inferior to the happiest effort of the bard of Avon, as player-people call William Shakspeare. I have not seen it represented; for, the free list being suspended, prudence would not permit me to attend. Had half-price been taken, I think I should have gone to the two-shilling gallery; but this question is irrelevant. "The author deserves well of his country. Indeed, his is a double claim; and the debt consequently due by the public would amount to a large _tottle_. No doubt the restoration of the drama is a matter of some importance; but surely the diminution of drumsticks is one of infinitely greater consideration!