Hugh walked back, in a close and heavy afternoon, across the fell, with
these thoughts struggling together in his heart. The valley was
breathlessly still, and the flies buzzed round him as he disturbed them
from the bracken. The whole world looked so sweet and noble, that it
was impossible not to think that it was moulded and designed by a Will
of unutterable graciousness and beauty. From the top, beside a little
crag full of clinging trees, that held on tenaciously to the crevices
and ledges, with so perfect an accommodation to their precarious
situation, Hugh surveyed the wide valleys, and saw the smoke ascend
from hamlets and houses, the lake as still as a mirror, while the
shadows lengthened on the hills, which seemed indeed to change their
very shapes by delicate gradations. It looked perfectly peaceful and
serene. Yet in how many houses were there unquiet and suffering
hearts, waiting in vain for respite or release! The pain of the world
pressed heavily upon Hugh; it seemed that if he could have breathed out
his life there upon the hill-top among the fern, to mingle with the
incense of the evening, that would be best; and yet even while he
thought it, there seemed to contend with his sadness an immense desire
for joy, for life; how many beautiful things there were to see, to
hear, to feel, to say; to be loved, to be needed--how Hugh craved for
that! While he sate, there alighted on his knee, with much
deliberation, a dry, varnished-looking, orange-banded fly, which might
have almost been turned out of a manufactory a moment before. It sent
out a thin and musical buzzing, as it cleaned its brown, large-eyed
head industriously with its long legs. It seemed to wish to sit with
Hugh; and again and again, after a short flight, it returned to the
same place. What was the meaning of this tiny, definite life, with its
short space of sun and shade, made with so curious and elaborate an
art, so whimsically adorned and glorified? Here again he was touched
close by the impenetrable mystery of things. But presently the
cheerful and complacent creature flew off on some secret errand, and
Hugh was left alone again.
He descended swiftly into the valley; the road was full of dust. The
vehicles, full of chattering, smoking, vacuous persons were speeding
home. The hands of many were full of poor fading flowers, torn from
lawn and ledge to please a momentary whim. Yet beside the road slid
the clear stream over its shingle, passing from brisk cascades into
dark and silent pools, fringed with rich water-plants, the trees bowing
over the water. How swiftly one passed from disgust and ugliness into
unimagined peace! It was all going forwards, all changing, all tending
to some unknown goal.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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