Bi-sexual love; the homosexual neurosisStekel, Wilhelm
Science
Bi-sexual love; the homosexual neurosis
Stekel, Wilhelm
Homosexuality; Neuroses
One night she woke from a dream in which her brother and she had
figured in a rather intimate role. This brought to her mind an
occurrence she had entirely forgotten. She was visiting her married
brother in the country. His wife had gone to some relatives and he
suggested that she should sleep in his wife’s bed. She did so without
having any particular erotic notions, since this was her brother with
whom she had always been frank, not as she was with her other brothers,
for she had four others. During the night she felt her brother’s hand
touching her. He crawled in to her bed and kissed her. She was sleepy
and thought she was dreaming. He kissed her again and sleepy as she
was, she responded. They embraced warmly. She knows that she took hold
of his _membrum_. She thinks her brother must have exercised wonderful
control over himself after that and that he crawled back in his own
bed. The whole experience of that night is rather unclear. That much
she is certain, no coitus took place.
This remembrance awed her for she knew then that she had lied to her
man. It happened only once for next day she left the place and her own
brother advised her to do it. She went to visit a friend of hers in
the neighborhood and returned only after her sister-in-law was back
home. But since her young man had such complete faith in her, she felt
that she must tell him the whole truth. She told him of the occurrence
relating how it took place as in a dream. He began to investigate and
to question until it drove her to distraction and there were times when
she herself wavered in her recollection as to what really occurred.
But she could only repeat the one thing: she knew positively that
they kissed and touched each other that night, but could not say that
between her brother and herself matters had gone beyond that.
Her bridegroom stayed away a few days. Then she received from him a
note stating that he does not feel that he can take her to the altar
after her confession and he considers himself therefore a free man. He
sent her back the engagement ring and demanded the return of all his
gifts and letters.
This was like a physical blow to her. That was the thanks she received
for her complete candor! She had taken at his word the man whom she
dearly loved. How could she help thinking that he merely sought an
excuse in her eyes, and in his own, a pretext to declare himself free?
For a time after that she hated all men. She made no exception,
including in her hatred even that brother who was responsible for her
misfortune, in the first place.
Then she arrived at a second deduction: “it is not worth while to be
honorable! Better be easy going, like all your women friends!”
Shortly after that she apparently ceased hating all men and her great
yearning began causing her to think continually of nothing but men. At
the same time there began also her uncontrollable vomiting.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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